Life
is like sowing seeds, not in our control: Buddhist
nun
Sunitha Rao
R Dec 16, 2015
Times of India
BENGALURU: "Life is like sprinkling seeds. You don't know which
ones will blossom into beautiful flowers, as their growth depends
on factors like soil and water.That's beyond one's
control."
Succinct and profound, the words of Bhikshuni Thubten Chodron
effectively summed up the dichotomy between human efforts and
reality.
A Chicago-born history teacher who got ordained as a Buddhist nun
in 1975, Chodron is popular for her practical explanations on
applying Buddhist teachings in daily life. In Bengaluru on Tuesday,
she spoke on `dealing with situations when they fall
apart'.
At the talk organized by The Garden of Samadhi Mind The Garden of
Samadhi Mind Centre, Chodron, 65, shared instances from her own
life."Over 18 years ago, I had a student who had potential and I
was trying to help him learn more. My other students organized a
party on my birthday and this particular student didn't show up.
Instead, he sent me a letter that shocked me. He said 'he is
stepping back, doesn't want to attend classes and wants to think
for himself'. This message hit me like the tsunami. It made me lose
confidence as a teacher. But I learnt a lesson -that I cannot
control anyone else. We see potential in people but they may not
see it themselves. When you encourage them, they think you are
pushing them," Chodronsaid.
No one shares your
sorrow
In her two-hour talk, Chodron threw light on various aspects of
human suffering and how to tackle them. "They are many who invite
others to their 'pity parties'. But no one attends them. Does
anybody come and tell you that 'your problem is my problem'? After
self-pity, we become furious. But that doesn't help either.We need
to change our perspective and accept our responsibilities.Your
present troubles may be a manifestation of the wrongs you have done
in a previous life," she pointed out.
Healing power of
compassion
Speaking about the power of an unconditional smile, she said the
impact of compassion is enormous. "This was a long time ago, when
one of my friends was 26. She had some problems, which gave rise to
suicidal tendencies. One day, she came across a stranger who smiled
at her; she said that changed her thinking. The stranger wouldn't
even know how heshe had helped her regain confidence and get on
with life. That's how compassion works. Being compassionate to
others helps us understand ourselves," Chodron
said.
Hurt by world
leaders
Chodron told TOI she was deeply disturbed by the decision of world
leaders to bomb terror-hit countries. "Human beings have great
potential. By creating fear, terrorists are hurting others and
hurting themselves. I'm also upset by the response of world
leaders. It is peace that gives satisfaction, not war. Violence
will only escalate the problem.In Iraq, Iran and Syria, generations
have suffered due to war. Each side has to give up something, to
make life peaceful," she said.