己所不欲，勿施于人 ** (don't give to others what you don't want)
Because of this Chinese saying, I had in the past always been
pretty particular about not giving away things that I no longer
want to others.
Over time though, I learned to loosen up with regards this
issue. In what sense? I reason that what I couldn't
use, others may actually find useful. And, what may not be
suitable for me may actually be suitable for others.
Over the years, my family has sent quite a lot of used clothes,
bags and shoes to a Third World country via a friend. The
feedback that we got was very positive. This has helped me
understand that it would be even more wasteful to hang on to things
you no longer have any use for, when they could well have utility
elsewhere.
If we give away used items with the motivation that the things we
give can find better use and benefit the new owner, then I think
it's OK. Of course, if the items are already in very poor
condition, broken, tattered or torn, then the only place for them
is the dustbin! However, if they are still useable, we can
attempt to find suitable owners for them.
What do others think about this issue? :)
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** of course, this Chinese saying actually has a larger meaning
that's more akin to "do unto others as you would have others
do unto you", but can also apply to mundane matters like giving
away used things.
Many buddhist temples in Singapore now have recycling programs.
If you don't want other stuffs such as clothings, books etc, you
can donate them out . Actually, this is a practice of
generosity.
As for this Confucian quote 己所不欲，勿施于人, the more applicable
philosophy behind this is that "do not impose upon others
what you do not like" (自己不喜歡的東西，千萬不要加在別人身上）. E.g. if you don't like others to be
rude to you, then don't be rude to others (asking you to be
polite). If you don't like others to criticize you, then don't
critize others. It's actually a confucian practice of you putting
yourself in other's shoe and being considerate of others (i.e. you
think of yourself as another person and think in terms of him). If
you wish yourself to live better, you also wish others to live
better. If you don't like yourself to live in poverty, then you
also don't wish others to live in poverty. It's more applicable to
moral conduct and behaviour.
In terms of donating the stuffs to others that you don't want,
it doesn't necessarily mean that you don't "like" these stuffs.
Thus, 己所不欲，勿施于人 doesn't always apply to the case of donation or
practice of generosity. What you don't want might be a need for
others. If it's something that you don't like, then naturally,
others might also not like it. In such a case, 己所不欲，勿施于人 does
apply.
In this sense, it's quite similar to the moral law of karma in
buddhism. You do a good thing, you reap good. You do evil, you reap
evil. If you don't want to receive evil, you don't do evil to
others.