Had a conversation with an American friend, he was asking me
about which practice to do for enlightenment... I told him there is
the gradual approach that emphasizes experience, and a direct
approach that emphasizes investigation and direct realization, for
example the practice of self-inquiry.
So he asked me how to practice self-inquiry. I said, it is to
question yourself, Who am I?
Of course like most people, they aren't satisfied with simple
answers, and want more details and explanation.. I said to him,
there is no how. It is a matter of investigation. I said, don't
think, don't conceptualize, don't intellectualize what you are.
Just keep questioning yourself, Who am I? What am I, really?
Nevertheless, the mind is bound to intellectualize things. Can't
help it, the mind simply has a tendency to chatter, a tendency and
desire to 'figure things out'.
But if and when they do arise with answers like 'I am so and
so', just see it for what it is - a thought story you spun about
yourself, but it is not the actuality of what you are. So look
directly at what you Actually are. Even without thoughts... what
are you? Simply investigate, and look.
There is really nothing much to it... your mind wants a
systematic method as it wants to make sure it's 'on the right
track', yet self-inquiry just isn't a systematic method that tells
you 'here's what you have to do: 1), 2), 3), and in doing so you
get 1), 2), 3) etc'... this is not a systematic method of practice.
This is just an investigation, and you need to be curious, that's
all.
Then, he told me that it's tough with all the concepts and
thinking and philosophizing going on in his mind and the tendency
to jump to a conclusion.
I said, just see that all concepts are simply labels and
words... but the word is not the thing, like the word 'moon' is not
the real moon. Same goes for 'presence, awareness, being' etc. So
once it is seen, drop the pointer (the word) and look at
actuality.
I also told him that along the way, there will be many times he
may wonder "is this it"... it has happened to me hundreds of times.
This is because through self inquiry you will often experience the
sense of presence, spaciousness, awareness, mirror like quality
etc. But just know that these are experiences. (See this article:
Realization and Experience and Non-Dual Experience
from Different Perspectives)
He asked, "how do you know when 'that's it'?"
I answered,
Realization comes when you realize the fact of being... and have
utter certainty and conviction. Then you will no longer doubt and
ask whether "this is it"... you will see that you can't deny it
even if you want to.
He said, "oh ok, a non-conceptual knowing rather than an
intellectual/logical conclusion".
I agreed and clarified, this is about a non-conceptual
realization. It is like those 'try to find the figure in this
picture' sort of thing, you simply realize it is so. It's like
trying to find the cow in this picture: http://www.thelogician.net/2b_phenome_nology/2b_appendix_3.htm.
It's there all along but needs to be realized. It's a
non-conceptual realization of an undeniable fact of existence. Like
the 'find the figure in this picture' thing, you don't need to
figure it out logically - you need to see it. And no amount of
intellectualizing helps just as no intellectualizing will help you
see the figure in the picture... you just need to keep looking,
keep investigating. There is no steps and systematic method to
figure it out, no 'how' - just keep looking and investigating and
you will get it. And once you see it, you can no longer unsee
it.