Notes taken over a period of a few days from a session of
questions and answers with a group of Western monks, 1972
Question:
I’m trying very hard in my practice but don’t seem to be getting
anywhere.
Answer:
This is very important. Don’t try to get anywhere in the practice.
The very desire to be free or to be enlightened will be the desire
that prevents your freedom. You can try as hard as you wish,
practice ardently night and day, but if it is still with the desire
to achieve in mind, you will never find peace. The energy from this
desire will be a cause for doubt and restlessness. No matter how
long or how hard you practice, wisdom will not arise from desire.
So, simply let go. Watch the mind and body mindfully but don’t try
to achieve anything. Don’t cling even to the practice of
enlightenment.
Q:
What about sleep? How much should I sleep?
A:
don’t ask me, I can’t tell you. A good average for some is four
hours a night. What is important, though, is that you watch and
know yourself. If you try to go with too little sleep, the body
will feel uncomfortable and mindfulness will be difficult to
sustain. Too much sleep leads to a dull or a restless mind. Find
the natural balance for yourself. Carefully watch the mind and body
and keep track of sleep needs until you find the optimum. If you
wake up and then roll over for a snooze, this is defilement.
Establish mindfulness as soon as your eyes open.
Q:
How about eating? How much should I eat?
A:
Eating is the same as sleeping. You must know yourself. Food must
be consumed to meet bodily needs. Look at your food as medicine.
Are you eating so much that you only feel sleepy after the meal and
are you getting fatter every day? Stop! Examine your own body and
mind. There is no need to fast. Instead, experiment with the amount
of food you take. Find the natural balance for your body. Put all
your food together in your bowl following the ascetic practice.
Then you can easily judge the amount you take. Watch yourself
carefully as you eat. Know yourself. The essence of our practice is
just this. There is nothing special you must do. Only watch.
Examine yourself. Watch the mind. Then you will know what is the
natural balance for your own practice.
Q:
Are minds of Asians and Westerners different?
A:
Basically there is no difference. Outer customs and language may
appear different, but the human mind has natural characteristics
which are the same for all people. Greed and hatred are the same in
an Eastern or a Western mind. Suffering and the cessation of
suffering are the same for all people.
Q:
Is it advisable to read a lot or study the scriptures as a part of
practice?
A:
The Dhamma of the Buddha is not found in books. If you want to
really see for yourself what the Buddha was talking about, you
don’t need to bother with books. Watch your own mind. Examine to
see how feelings come and go, how thoughts come and go. don’t be
attached to anything. Just be mindful of whatever there is to see.
This is the way to the truths of the Buddha. Be natural. Everything
you do in your life here is a chance to practice. It is all Dhamma.
When you do your chores, try to be mindful. If you are emptying a
spittoon or cleaning a toilet, don’t feel you are doing it as a
favor for anyone else. There is Dhamma in emptying spittoons. Don’t
feel you are practicing only when sitting still, cross-legged. Some
of you have complained that there is not enough time to meditate.
Is there enough time to breathe? This is your meditation:
mindfulness, naturalness in whatever you do.
Q:
Why don’t we have daily interviews with the teacher?
A:
If you have any questions, you are welcome to come and ask them
anytime. But we don’t need daily interviews here. If I answer your
every little question, you will never understand the process of
doubt in your own mind. It is essential that you learn to examine
yourself, to interview yourself. Listen carefully to the lecture
every few days, then use this teaching to compare with your own
practice. Is it still the same? Is it different? Why do you have
doubts? Who is it that doubts? Only through self-examination can
you understand.
Q:
Sometimes I worry about the monks’ discipline. If I kill insects
accidentally, is this bad?
A:
Sīla or discipline and morality are essential to our practice, but
you must not cling to the rules blindly. In killing animals or in
breaking other rules, the important thing is intention. Know your
own mind. You should not be excessively concerned about the monks’
discipline. If it is used properly, it supports the practice, but
some monks are so worried about the petty rules that they can’t
sleep well. Discipline is not to be carried as a burden. In our
practice here the foundation is discipline, good discipline plus
the ascetic rules and practices. Being mindful and careful of even
the many supporting rules as well as the basic 227 precepts has
great benefit. It makes life very simple. There need be no
wondering about how to act, so you can avoid thinking and instead
just be simply mindful. The discipline enables us to live together
harmoniously; the community runs smoothly. Outwardly everyone looks
and acts the same. Discipline and morality are the stepping stones
for further concentration and wisdom. By proper use of the monks’
discipline and the ascetic precepts, we are forced to live simply,
to limit our possessions. So here we have the complete practice of
the Buddha: refrain from evil and do good, live simply keeping to
basic needs, purify the mind. That is, be watchful of our mind and
body in all postures: sitting, standing, walking or lying, know
yourself.
Q:
What can I do about doubts? Some days I’m plagued with doubts about
the practice or my own progress, or the teacher.
A:
Doubting is natural. Everyone starts out with doubts. You can learn
a great deal from them. What is important is that you don’t
identify with your doubts: that is, don’t get caught up in them.
This will spin your mind in endless circles. Instead, watch the
whole process of doubting, of wondering. See who it is that doubts.
See how doubts come and go. Then you will no longer be victimized
by your doubts. You will step outside of them and your mind will be
quiet. You can see how all things come and go. Just let go of what
you are attached to. Let go of your doubts and simply watch. This
is how to end doubting.
Q:
What about other methods of practice? These days there seem to be
so many teachers and so many different systems of meditation that
it is confusing.
A:
It is like going into town. One can approach from the north, from
the southeast, from many roads. Often these systems just differ
outwardly. Whether you walk one way or another, fast or slow, if
you are mindful, it is all the same. There is one essential point
that all good practice must eventually come to – not clinging. In
the end, all meditation systems must be let go of. Neither can one
cling to the teacher. If a system leads to relinquishment, to not
clinging, then it is correct practice.
You may wish to travel, to visit other teachers and try other
systems. Some of you have already done so. This is a natural
desire. You will find out that a thousand questions asked and
knowledge of many systems will not bring you to the truth.
Eventually you will get bored. You will see that only by stopping
and examining your own mind can you find out what the Buddha talked
about. No need to go searching outside yourself. Eventually you
must return to face your own true nature. Here is where you can
understand the Dhamma.
Q:
A lot of times it seems that many monks here are not practicing.
They look sloppy or unmindful. This disturbs me.
A:
It is not proper to watch other people. This will not help your
practice. If you are annoyed, watch the annoyance in your own mind.
If others’ discipline is bad or they are not good monks, this is
not for you to judge. You will not discover wisdom watching others.
Monks’ discipline is a tool to use for your own meditation. It is
not a weapon to use to criticize or find fault. No one can do your
practice for you, nor can you do practice for anyone else. Just be
mindful of your own doings. This is the way to practice.
Q:
I have been extremely careful to practice sense restraint. I always
keep my eyes lowered and am mindful of every little action I do.
When eating, for example, I take a long time and try to see each
touch: chewing, tasting, swallowing, etc. I take each step very
deliberately and carefully. Am I practicing properly?
A:
Sense restraint is proper practice. We should be mindful of it
throughout the day. But don’t overdo it! Walk and eat and act
naturally. And then develop natural mindfulness of what is going on
within yourself. Don’t force your meditation nor force yourself
into awkward patterns. This is another form of craving. Be patient.
Patience and endurance are necessary. If you act naturally and are
mindful, wisdom will come naturally too.
Q:
Is it necessary to sit for very long stretches?
A:
No, sitting for hours on end is not necessary. Some people think
that the longer you can sit, the wiser you must be. I have seen
chickens sit on their nests for days on end! Wisdom comes from
being mindful in all postures. Your practice should begin as you
awaken in the morning. It should continue until you fall asleep.
Don’t be concerned about how long you can sit. What is important is
only that you keep watchful whether you are working or sitting or
going to the bathroom.
Each person has his own natural pace. Some of you will die at age
fifty, some at age sixty-five, and some at age ninety. So, too,
your practice will not be all identical. Don’t think or worry about
this. Try to be mindful and let things take their natural course.
Then your mind will become quieter and quieter in any surroundings.
It will become still like a clear forest pool. Then all kinds of
wonderful and rare animals will come to drink at the pool. You will
see clearly the nature of all things (sankhārās) in the world. You
will see many wonderful and strange things come and go. But you
will be still. Problems will arise and you will see through them
immediately. This is the happiness of the Buddha.
Q:
I still have very many thoughts. My mind wanders a lot even though
I am trying to be mindful.
A:
Don’t worry about this. Try to keep your mind in the present.
Whatever there is that arises in the mind, just watch it. Let go of
it. Don’t even wish to be rid of thoughts. Then the mind will reach
its natural state. No discriminating between good and bad, hot and
cold, fast and slow. No me and no you, no self at all. Just what
there is. When you walk on alms-round, no need to do anything
special. Simply walk and see what there is. No need to cling to
isolation or seclusion. Wherever you are, know yourself by being
natural and watching. If doubts arise, watch them come and go. It’s
very simple. Hold on to nothing.
It is as though you are walking down a road. Periodically you will
run into obstacles. When you meet defilements, just see them and
just overcome them by letting go of them. don’t think about the
obstacles you have passed already. Don’t worry about those you have
not yet seen. Stick to the present. Don’t be concerned about the
length of the road or about the destination. Everything is
changing. Whatever you pass, do not cling to it. Eventually the
mind will reach its natural balance where practice is automatic.
All things will come and go of themselves.
Q:
Have you ever looked at the Altar Sutra of the 6th Patriarch, Hui
Neng?
A:
Hui Neng’s wisdom is very keen. It is very profound teaching, not
easy for beginners to understand. But if you practice with our
discipline and with patience, if you practice not-clinging, you
will eventually understand. Once I had a disciple who stayed in a
grass-roofed hut. It rained often that rainy season and one day a
strong wind blew off half the roof. He did not bother to fix it,
just let it rain in. Several days passed and I asked him about his
hut. He said he was practicing not-clinging. This is not-clinging
without wisdom. It is about the same as the equanimity of a water
buffalo. If you live a good life and live simply, if you are
patient and unselfish, you will understand the wisdom of Hui
Neng.
Q:
You have said that samatha and vipassanā or concentration and
insight are the same. Could you explain this further?
A:
It is quite simple. Concentration (samatha) and wisdom (vipassanā)
work together. First the mind becomes still by holding on to a
meditation object. It is quiet only while you are sitting with your
eyes closed. This is samatha and eventually this samādhi-base is
the cause for wisdom or vipassanā to arise. Then the mind is still
whether you sit with your eyes closed or walk around in a busy
city. It’s like this. Once you were a child. Now you are an adult.
Are the child and the adult the same person? You can say that they
are, or looking at it another way, you can say that they are
different. In this way samatha and vipassanā could also be looked
at as separate. Or it is like food and feces. Food and feces could
be called the same and they can be called different. Don’t just
believe what I say, do your practice and see for yourself. Nothing
special is needed. If you examine how concentration and wisdom
arise, you will know the truth for yourself. These days many people
cling to the words. They call their practice vipassana. Samatha is
looked down on. Or they call their practice samatha. It is
essential to do samatha before vipassanā, they say. All this is
silly. Don’t bother to think about it in this way. Simply do the
practice and you’ll see for yourself.
Q:
Is it necessary to be able to enter absorption in our practice?
A:
No, absorption is not necessary. You must establish a modicum of
tranquillity and one-pointedness of mind. Then you use this to
examine yourself. Nothing special is needed. If absorption comes in
your practice, this is OK too. Just don’t hold on to it. Some
people get hung up with absorption. It can be great fun to play
with. You must know proper limits. If you are wise, then you will
know the uses and limitations of absorption, just as you know the
limitations of children verses grown men.
Q:
Why do we follow the ascetic rules such as only eating out of our
bowls?
A:
The ascetic precepts are to help us cut defilement. By following
the ones such as eating out of our bowls we can be more mindful of
our food as medicine. If we have no defilements, then it does not
matter how we eat. But here we use the form to make our practice
simple. The Buddha did not make the ascetic precepts necessary for
all monks, but he allowed them for those who wished to practice
strictly. They add to our outward discipline and thereby help
increase our mental resolve and strength. These rules are to be
kept for yourself. Don’t watch how others practice. Watch your own
mind and see what is beneficial for you. The rule that we must take
whatever meditation cottage assigned to us is a similarly helpful
discipline. It keeps monks from being attached to their dwelling
place. If they go away and return, they must take a new dwelling.
This is our practice – not to cling to anything.
Q:
If putting everything together in our bowls is important, why don’t
you as a teacher do it yourself? Don’t you feel it is important for
the teacher to set an example?
A:
Yes, it is true, a teacher should set an example for his disciples.
I don’t mind that you criticize me. Ask whatever you wish. But it
is important that you do not cling to the teacher. If I were
absolutely perfect in outward form, it would be terrible. You would
all be too attached to me. Even the Buddha would sometimes tell his
disciples to do one thing and then do another himself. Your doubts
in your teacher can help you. You should watch your own reactions.
Do you think it is possible that I keep some food out of my bowl in
dishes to feed the laymen who work around the temple?
Wisdom is for yourself to watch and develop. Take from the teacher
what is good. Be aware of your own practice. If I am resting while
you must all sit up, does this make you angry? If I call the color
blue red or say that male is female, don’t follow me blindly.
One of my teachers ate very fast. He made noises as he ate. Yet he
told us to eat slowly and mindfully. I used to watch him and get
very upset. I suffered, but he didn’t! I watched the outside. Later
I learned. Some people drive very fast but carefully. Others drive
slowly and have many accidents. Don’t cling to rules, to outer
form. If you watch others at most ten percent of the time and watch
yourself ninety percent, this is the proper practice. At first I
used to watch my teacher Ajahn Tong Raht and had many doubts.
People even thought he was mad. He would do strange things or get
very fierce with his disciples. Outside he was angry, but inside
there was nothing. Nobody there. He was remarkable. He stayed clear
and mindful until the moment he died.
Looking outside the self is comparing, discriminating. You will not
find happiness that way. Nor will you find peace if you spend your
time looking for the perfect man or the perfect teacher. The Buddha
taught us to look at the Dhamma, the truth, not to look at other
people.
Q:
How can we overcome lust in our practice? Sometimes I feel as if I
am a slave to my sexual desire.
A:
Lust should be balanced by contemplation of loathesomeness.
Attachment to bodily form is one extreme and one should keep in
mind the opposite. Examine the body as a corpse and see the process
of decay or think of the parts of the body such as the lungs,
spleen, fat, feces, and so forth. Remember these and visualize this
loathesome aspect of the body when lust arises. This will free you
from lust.
Q:
How about anger? What should I do when I feel anger arising?
A:
You must use loving-kindness. When angry states of mind arise in
meditation, balance them by developing feelings of loving-kindness.
If someone does something bad or gets angry, don’t get angry
yourself. If you do, you are being more ignorant than they. Be
wise. Keep in mind compassion, for that person is suffering. Fill
your mind with loving-kindness as if he were a dear brother.
Concentrate on the feeling of loving-kindness as a meditation
subject. Spread it to all beings in the world. Only through
loving-kindness is hatred overcome.
Sometimes you may see other monks behaving badly. You may get
annoyed. This is suffering unnecessarily. It is not yet our Dhamma.
You may think like this: ’’He is not as strict as I am. They are
not serious meditators like us. Those monks are not good monks’’.
This is a great defilement on your part. Do not make comparisons.
Do not discriminate. Let go of your opinion as watch your opinions
and watch yourself. This is our Dhamma. You can’t possibly make
everyone act as you wish or be like you. This wish will only make
you suffer. It is a common mistake for meditators to make, but
watching other people won’t develop wisdom. Simply examine
yourself, your feelings. This is how you will understand.
Q:
I feel sleepy a great deal. It makes it hard to meditate.
A:
There are many ways to overcome sleepiness. If you are sitting in
the dark, move to a lighted place. Open your eyes. Get up and wash
your face or take a bath. If you are sleepy, change postures. Walk
a lot. Walk backwards. The fear of running into things will keep
you awake. If this fails, stand still, clear the mind and imagine
it is full daylight. Or sit on the edge of a high cliff or deep
well. You won’t dare sleep! If nothing works, then just go to
sleep. Lay down carefully and try to be aware until the moment you
fall asleep. Then as you awaken, get right up. Don’t look at the
clock or roll over. Start mindfulness from the moment you awaken.
If you find yourself sleepy everyday, try to eat less. Examine
yourself. As soon as five more spoonfuls will make you full, stop.
Then take water until just properly full. Go and sit. Watch your
sleepiness and hunger. You must learn to balance your eating. As
your practice goes on you will feel naturally more energetic and
eat less. But you must adjust yourself.
Q:
Why must we do so much prostrating here?
A:
Prostrating is very important. It is an outward form that is part
of practice. This form should be done correctly. Bring the forehead
all the way to the floor. Have the elbows near the knees and the
palms of the hands on the floor about three inches apart. Prostrate
slowly, be mindful of your body. It is a good remedy for our
conceit. We should prostrate often. When you prostrate three times
you can keep in mind the qualities of the Buddha, the Dhamma and
the Sangha, that is, the qualities of mind of purity, radiance and
peace. So we use the outward form to train ourselves. Body and mind
become harmonious. Don’t make the mistake of watching how others
prostrate. If young novices are sloppy or the aged monks appear
unmindful, this is not for you to judge. People can be difficult to
train. Some learn fast but others learn slowly. Judging others will
only increase your pride. Watch yourself instead. Prostrate often,
get rid of your pride.
Those who have really become harmonious with the Dhamma get far
beyond the outward form. Everything they do is a way of
prostrating. Walking, they prostrate; eating, they prostrate;
defecating, they prostrate. This is because they have got beyond
selfishness.
Q:
What is the biggest problem of your new disciples?
A:
Opinions. Views and ideas about all things. About themselves, about
practice, about the teachings of the Buddha. Many of those who come
here have a high rank in the community. There are wealthy merchants
or college graduates, teachers and government officials. Their
minds are filled with opinions about things. They are too clever to
listen to others. It is like water in a cup. If a cup is filled
with dirty, stale water, it is useless. Only after the old water is
thrown out can the cup become useful. You must empty your minds of
opinions, then you will see. Our practice goes beyond cleverness
and beyond stupidity. If you think, ’’I am clever, I am wealthy, I
am important, I understand all about Buddhism’’. You cover up the
truth of anattā or no-self. All you will see is self, I, mine. But
Buddhism is letting go of self. Voidness, emptiness, Nibbāna.
Q:
Are defilements such as greed or anger merely illusory or are they
real?
A:
They are both. The defilements we call lust or greed, or anger or
delusion, these are just outward names, appearances. Just as we
call a bowl large, small, pretty, or whatever. This is not reality.
It is the concept we create from craving. If we want a big bowl, we
call this one small. Craving causes us to discriminate. The truth,
though, is merely what is. Look at it this way. Are you a man? You
can say ’’yes’’. This is the appearance of things. But really you
are only a combination of elements or a group of changing
aggregates. If the mind is free, it does not discriminate. No big
and small, no you and me. There is nothing: anattā, we say, or
non-self. Really, in the end there is neither atta nor anattā.
Q:
Could you explain a little more about karma?
A:
Karma is action. Karma is clinging. Body, speech, and mind all make
karma when we cling. We make habits. These can make us suffer in
the future. This is the fruit of our clinging, of our past
defilement. All attachment leads to making karma. Suppose you were
a thief before you became a monk. You stole, made others unhappy,
made your parents unhappy. Now you are a monk, but when you
remember how you made others unhappy, you feel bad and suffer
yourself even today. Remember, not only body, but speech and mental
action can make conditions for future results. If you did some act
of kindness in the past and remember it today, you will be happy.
This happy state of mind is the result of past karma. All things
are conditioned by cause – both long term and, when examined,
moment to moment. But you need not bother to think about past, or
present, or future. Merely watch the body and mind. You must figure
karma out for yourself. Watch your mind. Practice and you will see
clearly. Make sure, however, that you leave the karma of others to
them. Don’t cling to and don’t watch others. If I take a poison, I
suffer. No need for you to share it with me! Take what is good that
your teacher offers. Then you can become peaceful, your mind will
become like that of your teacher. If you will examine it, you will
see. Even if now you don’t understand, when you practice, it will
become clear. You will know by yourself. This is called practicing
the Dhamma.
When we were young, our parents used to discipline us and get
angry. Really they wanted to help us. You must see it over the long
term. Parents and teachers criticize us and we get upset. Later on
we see why. After long practice you will know. Those who are too
clever leave after a short time. They never learn. You must get rid
of your cleverness. If you think yourself better than others, you
will only suffer. What a pity. No need to get upset. Just
watch.
Q:
Sometimes it seems that since becoming a monk I have increased my
hardships and suffering.
A:
I know that some of you have had a background of material comfort
and outward freedom. By comparison, now you live an austere
existence. Then in the practice, I often make you sit and wait for
long hours. Food and climate are different from your home. But
everyone must go through some of this. This is the suffering that
leads to the end of suffering. This is how you learn. When you get
angry and feel sorry for yourself, it is a great opportunity to
understand the mind. The Buddha called defilements our
teachers.
All my disciples are like my children. I have only loving kindness
and their welfare in mind. If I appear to make you suffer, it is
for your own good. I know some of you are well-educated and very
knowledgeable. People with little education and worldly knowledge
can practice easily. But it is as if you Westerners have a very
large house to clean. When you have cleaned the house, you will
have a big living space. You can use the kitchen, the library, the
living room. You must be patient. Patience and endurance are
essential to our practice. When I was a young monk I did not have
it as hard as you. I knew the language and was eating my native
food. Even so, some days I despaired. I wanted to disrobe or even
commit suicide. This kind of suffering comes from wrong views. When
you have seen the truth, though, you are free from views and
opinions. Everything becomes peaceful.
Q:
I have been developing very peaceful states of mind from
meditation. What should I do now?
A:
This is good. Make the mind peaceful, concentrated. Use this
concentration to examine the mind and body. When the mind is not
peaceful, you should also watch. Then you will know true peace.
Why? Because you will see impermanence. Even peace must be seen as
impermanent. If you are attached to peaceful states of mind you
will suffer when you do not have them. Give up everything, even
peace.
Q:
Did I hear you say that you are afraid of very diligent
disciples?
A:
Yes, that’s right. I am afraid. I am afraid that they are too
serious. They try too hard, but without wisdom. They push
themselves into unnecessary suffering. Some of you are determined
to become enlightened. You grit your teeth and struggle all the
time. This is trying too hard. People are all the same. They don’t
know the nature of things (sankhārā). All formations, mind and
body, are impermanent. Simply watch and don’t cling.
Others think they know. They criticize, they watch, they judge.
That’s OK. Leave their opinions to them. This discrimination is
dangerous. It is like a road with a very sharp curve. If we think
others are worse or better or the same as us, we go off the curve.
If we discriminate, we will only suffer.
Q:
I have been meditating many years now. My mind is open and peaceful
in almost all circumstances. Now I would like to try to backtrack
and practice high states of concentration or mind absorption.
A:
This is fine. It is beneficial mental exercise. If you have wisdom,
you will not get hung up on concentrated states of mind. It is the
same as wanting to sit for long periods. This is fine for training,
but really, practice is separate from any posture. It is a matter
of directly looking at the mind. This is wisdom. When you have
examined and understood the mind, then you have the wisdom to know
the limitations of concentration, or of books. If you have
practiced and understand not-clinging, you can then return to the
books. They will be like a sweet dessert. They can help you to
teach others. Or you can go back to practice absorption. You have
the wisdom to know not to hold on to anything.
Q:
Would you review some of the main points of our discussion?
A:
You must examine yourself. Know who you are. Know your body and
mind by simply watching. In sitting, in sleeping, in eating, know
your limits. Use wisdom. The practice is not to try to achieve
anything. Just be mindful of what is. Our whole meditation is
looking directly at the mind. You will see suffering, its cause and
its end. But you must have patience; much patience and endurance.
Gradually you will learn. The Buddha taught his disciples to stay
with their teachers for at least five years. You must learn the
values of giving, of patience and of devotion.
Don’t practice too strictly. Don’t get caught up with outward form.
Watching others is bad practice. Simply be natural and watch that.
Our monks’ discipline and monastic rules are very important. They
create a simple and harmonious environment. Use them well. But
remember, the essence of the monks’ discipline is watching
intention, examining the mind. You must have wisdom. Don’t
discriminate. Would you get upset at a small tree in the forest for
not being tall and straight like some of the others? This is silly.
Don’t judge other people. There are all varieties. No need to carry
the burden of wishing to change them all.
So, be patient. Practice morality. Live simply and be natural.
Watch the mind. This is our practice. It will lead you to
unselfishness. To peace.