i was so wrong, at first was told that having intimacy with
other than one spouse is 邪淫. Never never knew it was otherwise.
Like that no need marry liao
Don't worry, still can marry.
Undesirable sexual behaviours are quite broad, so after
understanding more, as Buddhists, we should slowly eliminated
them one by one according to our abilities and circumtances. The
first few examples of undesirable conducts are easy to indentify
and be given up easily and naturally. I think you are more concern
of sexual behaviours between a truly loving couple.
What JiKiat said is very true. So I think even sexual behaviour
between married couple should not be overly excessive. One reason
is that does such behaviour really neccessary for relationship
bonding? Or has it more to do with sexual gratifications for
oneself? I think once we are clear of this, we will know what
to do naturally, no worries. Just like eating meat, we can chose to
eat less or give up totally, or don't care at all. But i
do agree that our partner play a big role in achieving the way
of life we want to lead. So, chose your life partner carefully,
don't cohabitat so fast.
Of cos, normally, a married couple would like to have children
of their own, in this case sexual intimacy is neccessary for
procreation purposes. But I think after our 'quota 'of kids have
been achieved, and/or both partners have come to a certain age (
sorry, just my opinion, I feel married or unmarried senior
folks should not indulge in this anymore, but spend more time and
resources on wisdom building), we
should understand that sexual conducts are just that: sexual
activities. Such pleasure attachments should be drop if
possible.