How to help other people make good merit?

justdoit77 SG

I got a relative who recently asked me to join a refuge taking session in golden pagoda temple, I told her that I took refuge already so won't take time to go golden pagoda temple for it, this is partly due to my time constraint as well.

She seems like very persistent to ask me to take refuge everytime she sees me then suddendly I was thinking, it is actually a good merit to persuade someone to take refuge to the triple gems or to teach someone to practise buddhism.
So, if I insist of not going there to take refuge, she most likely will ask again, and her merit will accumulate more and more. Smile
Is this a good idea?

An Eternal Now SG

Erm, I think the question is... is it necessary??

Since you already taken refuge, and she keep asking you to take refuge again, then what is the reason for that? But if she teach people dharma, that is good.

justdoit77 SG

I don't know is it necessary or not, but my point is if I don't do that, then she will have more opportunity to create good karma for herself.
What do you think?

sinweiy SG

Originally posted by justdoit77:
I don't know is it necessary or not, but my point is if I don't do that, then she will have more opportunity to create good karma for herself.
What do you think?[/b]

one word: greed.

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sinweiy SG

there's no actual gongde/virtue, just fu de(merit) or even no merit at all. like in the story of Liang Wu Emperor.

The Emperor started to talk about his building of temples and giving financial support to monastics. He then asked Bodhidharma how much merit he accumulated in the process. Emperor Wu felt that the patriach might not know about of the good deeds that he made, so he pointed them out to Bodhidharma. The patriarch felt that Emperor Wu was providing his own promotion campaign rather than seeking the Dharma to end birth and death; instead, he wanted to boast of his own merit and virtue. Thinking that the emperor might have been drunk on his own ego, Bodhidharma replied, "Actually, you have no merit and virtue. In truth, no merit and virtue at all."

Perplexed, the Emperor then asked, "Well, what is the fundamental teaching of Buddhism?" The bewildering reply was "vast emptiness."

"Listen," said the Emperor, now losing all patience, "just who do you think you are?" Bodhidharma replied, "I have no idea."

Bodhidharma originally went to Emperor Wu with the idea of saving him. However, he was too conceited; he had too high an opinion of himself. Being an emperor was already something, he thought. He had built many temples, enabled people to leave home, given away a lot of money, and made a lot of offerings to the Triple Gem. So, he thought that he had created a tremendous amount of merit and virtue. Bodhidharma, wanting to shatter the emperor's attachment, replied that he had no merit and virtue at all.

http://www.answers.com/topic/emperor-wu-of-liang

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path_seeker SG

Actually by asking you to take refuge won't let her accumulate more merit.

Though you have taken refuge, it's okie to go for numerous refuge taking ceremoney, because you will be reminded by the witnessing sangha of the true objective of the ceremony, which you could have forgotten. It's a also a good chance for you to listen to the dharma talks conducted at the ceremony. She may feel that the talk that the witnessing sangha will be giving is beneficial for you.

Personally I think she meant well, and it's not nice to think otherwise. Of course, if you do not feel comfortable, just have a chat with her. Maybe you may end up correcting some of her views and she won't pester you in the future.

paperflower SG

hhmm.... how do u know what's on the person's mind? why is it greed that you thought it was?

i don't know about the rest, but if a person invite me to take refuge many times, i don't see the greed in that person. its a good cause after all. anyway it is also a personal decision, can explain that one has already taken refuge & it also is ok to go again if not just politely ask for some dharma teachings you can attend. so i feel it's too soon to say its about greed base on indefinite scenario. there are many types of greed. i don't know, sorry to say this i think you shouldn't say it's greed.

Smile

paperflower SG

yeah is it necessary but on the other hand, also no harm taking refuge again.
just like past life u took refuge, then this lifetime u take again & so next life time u might take refuge again. in this case one can also say, is it necessary?
well, its not all about how many times a person take refuge, it is about how one cultivates through out the many lifetimes as each day is also a reborn.

paperflower SG

it's a blessing & merit that a person is able to take refuge in the tripple gem. given one rare chance is precious enough, when given multiple times its too great a blessing to reject. some may not even have a single chance to take refuge at all. its like those who are poor & starving but on the other side of the world people with plenty food are fuzzing away what to eat & how much to eat.

justdoit77 SG

I agree that taking refuge numerous time does benefits one.
actually I don't mind to be pestered by her if doing it give her good karma.
Come to think of it, this is quite a funny idea though. haha

sinweiy SG

Originally posted by paperflower:

hhmm.... how do u know what's on the person's mind? why is it greed that you thought it was?

i don't know about the rest, but if a person invite me to take refuge many times, i don't see the greed in that person. its a good cause after all. anyway it is also a personal decision, can explain that one has already taken refuge & it also is ok to go again if not just politely ask for some dharma teachings you can attend. so i feel it's too soon to say its about greed base on indefinite scenario. there are many types of greed. i don't know, sorry to say this i think you shouldn't say it's greed.

Smile [/b]

it's ok. i was merely based on the description by justdoit77 saying "then she will have more opportunity to create good karma for herself. ". i might not meant to have directed to the actual person.
but u are right, there shouldn't be any judging. Smile

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