Stage 3: From the large "I" to no "I"
When one reaches the height of the second stage, he
realizes that the concept of the "I" does not exist. But he has
only abandoned the small "I" and has not negated the concept of
basic substance or the existence of God; you may call it Truth, the
one and only God, the Almighty, the Unchanging Principle, or even
the Buddha of Buddhism. If you think that it is real, then
you are still in the realm of the big "I" and have not left the
sphere of philosophy and religion.
I must emphasize that the content of Chan does not appear
until the third stage. Chan is unimaginable. It is neither
a concept nor a feeling. It is impossible to describe it in any
terms abstract or concrete. Though meditation is ordinarily the
proper path leading to Chan, once you have arrived at the door of
Chan, even the method of meditation is rendered useless. It is like
using various means of transportation on a long journey. When you
reach the final destination, you find a steep cliff standing right
in front of you. It is so high you cannot see its top, and so wide
that its side cannot be found. At this time a person who has been
to the other side of the cliff comes to tell you that on the other
side lies the world of Chan. When you scale it you will enter Chan.
And yet, he tells you not to depend on any means of transportation
to fly over, bypass, or penetrate through it, because it is
infinity itself, and there is no way to scale it.
Even an outstanding Chan master able to bring his student to this
place will find himself unable to help any more. Although he has
been to the other side, he cannot take you there with him, just as
a mother's own eating and drinking cannot take the hunger away from
the child who refuses to eat or drink. At that time, the only help
he can give you is to tell you to discard all your experiences,
your knowledge, and all the things and ideas that you think are the
most reliable, most magnificent, and most real, even including your
hope to get to the world of Chan. It is as if you were entering a
sacred building. Before you do so, the guard tells you that you
must not carry any weapon, that you must take off all your clothes,
and that not only must you be completely naked you also have to
leave your body and soul behind. Then you can enter.
Because Chan is a world where there is no self, if there is still
any attachment at all in your mind, there is no way you can
harmonies with Chan. Therefore, Chan is the territory of the wise,
and the territory of the brave. Not being wise, one would not
believe that after he has abandoned all attachments another world
could appear before him. Not being brave, one would find it very
hard to discard everything he has accumulated in this life - ideals
and knowledge, spiritual and material things.
You may ask what benefit we would get after making such great
sacrifices to enter the world of Chan. Let me tell you that you
cannot enter the world of Chan while this question is still with
you. Looking for benefit, either for self or for others, is in the
"I"-oriented stage. The sixth patriarch of the Chan sect in China
taught people that the way to enter the enlightenment of the realm
of Chan is: Neither think of good, nor think of evil. That is, you
eliminate such opposing views as self and other, inner and outer,
being and non-being, large and small, good and bad, vexation and
Bodhi, illusion and enlightenment, false and true, or suffering of
birth and death and joy of emancipation. Only then can the realm of
Chan or enlightenment appear and bring you a new life.
This new life you have had all along, and yet you have never
discovered it. In the Chan sect we call it your original face
before you were born. This is not the small "I" of body and mind,
nor the large "I" of the world and universe. This is absolute
freedom, free from the misery of all vexations and bonds. To enter
Chan as described above is not easy. Many people have studied and
meditated for decades, and still have never gained entrance to the
door of Chan. It will not be difficult, however, when your causes
and conditions are mature, or if you happen to have a good Chan
master who guides you with full attention. This Master may adopt
various attitudes, actions and verbal expressions which may seem
ridiculous to you, as indirect means of assisting you to achieve
your goal speedily. And when the Master tells you that you have now
entered the gate, you will suddenly realize that there is no gate
to Chan. Before entering, you cannot see where the gate is, and
after entering you find the gate non-existent. Otherwise there will
be the distinction between inside and outside, the enlightened and
the ignorant; and if there are such distinctions, then it is still
not Chan.
When you are in the second stage, although you feel that
the "I" does not exist, the basic substance of the universe, or the
Supreme Truth, still exists. Although you recognize that all the
different phenomena are the extension of this basic substance or
Supreme Truth, yet there
still exists the opposition of basic substance versus external
phenomena. Not until the distinctions of all phenomena
disappear, and everything goes back to truth or Heaven, will you
have absolute peace and unity. As long as the world of
phenomena is still active, you cannot do away with conflict,
calamity, suffering and crime. Therefore, although philosophers and
religious figures perceive the peace of the original substance,
they still have no way to get rid of the confusion of
phenomena.
One who has
entered Chan does not see basic substance and phenomena as two
things standing in opposition to each other. They
cannot even be illustrated as being the back and palm of a hand.
This is because
phenomena themselves are basic substance, and apart from phenomena
there is no basic substance to be found. The reality of
basic substance exists right in the unreality of phenomena, which
change ceaselessly and have no constant form. This is the
Truth. When you experience that phenomena are unreal, you
will then be free from the concept of self and other, right and
wrong, and free from the vexations of greed, hatred, worry and
pride. You will not need to search for peace and purity, and you
will not need to detest evil vexations and impurity. Although you
live in the world of phenomenal reality, to you, any environment is
a Buddha's Pure Land. To an unenlightened person, you are but an
ordinary person. To you, all ordinary people are identical with
Buddha. You will feel that your own self-nature is the same as that
of all Buddhas, and the self-nature of Buddhas is universal
throughout time and space. You will spontaneously apply your wisdom
and wealth, giving to all sentient beings everywhere, throughout
all time and space.
What I have said reveals a small part of the feeling of one who has
entered the enlightened realm of Chan, and is also the course which
one follows in order to depart from the small "I" and arrive at the
stage of no "I". Nevertheless, a newly enlightened person who has
just entered the realm of Chan is still at the starting section of
the entire passage of Chan. He is like one who has just had his
first sip of port. He knows its taste now, but the wine will not
remain in his mouth forever. The purpose of Chan is not just to let
you take one sip, but to have your entire life merge with and
dissolve in the wine, even, to the point that you forget the
existence of yourself and the wine. After tasting the first sip of
egolessness, how much farther must one travel?
What kinds of things remain to be seen?
I will tell you when I have the chance!