PERFORMANCE APPRAISAL
TERMS
AND THEIR REAL
MEANINGS
1.OUTGOING
PERSONALITY....?...Always going out of the office
2.GREAT PRESENTATION
SKILLS??...................Able to bullshit
3.GOOD COMMUNICATION
SKILLS....Spends lots of time on phone
4.AVERAGE
EMPLOYEE...????..........................Not too bright
5.EXCEPTIONALLY WELL
QUALIFIED......Made no major blunders yet
6.WORK IS FIRST
PRIORITY...??............Too ugly to get a date
7.ACTIVE
SOCIALLY.................??????...............Drinks a
lot
8.FAMILY IS ACTIVE
SOCIALLY.............??....Spouse drinks, too
9.INDEPENDENT
WORKER......?......Nobody knows what he/she does
10.QUICK
THINKING.........???...........Offers plausible excuses
11.CAREFUL
THINKER.....??..................Won't make a decision
12.AGGRESSIVE.....??????..................................Obnoxious
13.USES LOGIC ON
DIFFICULT JOBS...?...Gets someone else to do it
14.EXPRESSES THEMSELVES
WELL.....................Speaks English
15.METICULOUS ATTENTION
TO DETAIL..................A nit picker
16.HAS LEADERSHIP
QUALITIES.......Is tall or has a louder voice
17.EXCEPTIONALLY GOOD
JUDGMENT...........................Lucky
18.KEEN SENSE OF
HUMOUR..............Knows a lot of dirty jokes
19.CAREER
MINDED................????..................Back Stabber
20.LOYAL...????.......................Can't
get a job anywhere else
21.CHARACTER ABOVE
REPROACH.....Still one step ahead of the law
22.PLANS FOR
PROMOTION/ADVANCEMENT??..Buys drinks for all the boys
23.OF GREAT VALUE TO THE
ORGANISATION..?...Gets to work on time
24.RELAXED
ATTITUDE........................???......Sleeps at desk