A lot of people who end up paralysed or suffer from chronic
disabilities end up wanting to die. 
There were lots of these people that I encountered in my previous
ward. The stroke patients, brain tumours as well as the Accident or
Assault victims all came to us.
Whenever I could spare the time, I'd talk to them and a lot of
times, although they are unable to talk, they'll try so hard to
communicate with you. Most of the time, they wanted to know what
was happening to them and I'd always try to explain to them and
encourage them to not give up. Sometimes, it's really really hard
to communicate and you have to use some sort of board with
alphabets written and point to each row and alphabet and spell out
the words one-by-one before you knew what they wanted.
When I was sent to nurse a patient with an 'unknown' disease for a
period of time once, I was so fearful. Because the diagnosis was
'unknown' and the colleagues she had come into contact with were
falling ill one-by-one, it was really frightening. We couldn't
enter her room without the full safety gear, ie. the goggles, the
N95 mask, the disposable hair cover, the full disposable gown, and
double-gloved, and it was hot under that gear. 
I nursed her for weeks and I remember having a nightmare where I
woke up in her room, critically ill myself, with a breathing tube,
not able to talk, people looking at me from the glass wall but not
able to come in... and I was crying and crying thinking, "Noo...
don't let me catch her disease, please!!" I woke up in tears.
We are all mortals and we won't know when our time on earth shall
come to an end. Our bodies will slowly fail us, we may be hit with
afflictions that might render us immobile or chronically ill. The
best thing to do is to stay courageous and soldier on. It's hard to
accept it when our body parts fail us, but gradually, we'll have to
accept that we cannot change anything but our attitudes and live on
for ourselves, for our family, for our friends, and most
importantly, for God.
elindra, I encourage you and Chris to visit your friend as often as
you can. A lot of times, they get visitors in the beginning, then
the visitors slowly trickle to a stop, and they're left feeling all
alone and forgotten. That's what my friend, who had Leukemia and
died told us. She cried and said that in the first week or so,
EVERYONE came to visit her and she felt so loved. Then, over the
next few months, only a small handful remembered her and she felt
very depressed.
My heart goes out to your friend... the road ahead will not be
easy. I hope he finds the will to live on.
