TOP 40 SIGNS THAT YOU'VE BEEN ONLINE TOO
LONG
1. Your dog leaves you.
2. You can read and follow all the names on the cast list that
scrolls up your TV screen at the end of a movie.
4. You dream in "text."
5. Being called a Newbie is a "major" insult.
6. There is absolutely no interesting chat in any room and you're
really bored.
7. You don't want to leave the computer in case you miss
something.
8. You double click your TV remote.
9. You can now type over 70 wpm.
10. You are on the phone a minute and need to do something else, so
you say "BRB" or "BBL."
11. You go into withdrawal during dinner.
12. You spend at least 30 minutes making sure you say goodbye to
everyone in a room.
13. You stop speaking in full sentences.
14. You know what a "snert" is.
15. You won't work at a job that doesn't have a modem
involved.
16. You write a letter like this: "dear tom, hiyas! how r u doin
well I gotta go bbl!"
17. You smile sideways :-)
18. You sign on and immediately get 10 IMs from people who have you
on their buddy list.
19. You bring a bag lunch and a cooler to the computer.
20. You suffer from withdrawal if you're away from the computer for
more than a few hours.
21. You take a speed-reading course to keep up with the
scrolling.
22. Your buddy list has over 100 people on it.
23. You wake up in the morning and the first thing you do is get
online before you have your first cup of coffee.
24. You get up at 2 a.m. to go to the bathroom but turn on the
computer instead.
25. You don't even notice when someone has a typo.
26. You stop typing whole words and use things like ppl, dunno and
lemme.
27. Your voicemail/answering machine message is "BRB, leave your
s/n & I will TTYL."
28. You type faster than you think.
29. You want to be buried with your computer when it dies, or vice
versa.
30. Tech Support calls you for help.
31. Someone at work tells you a joke and you say "LOL."
32. You watch TV with the closed captioning turned on.
33. You keep begging your friends to get an account so "you can
hang out."
34. Your wife goes into labor and you stop to type a special e-mail
to let everyone know you're going to be "away."
35. You have a vanity car tag with your screen name on it.
36. You no longer type with proper capitalization, punctuation or
complete sentences.
37. You begin to say "heh heh heh" instead of laughing.
38. When someone says, "What did you say?" you reply, "Scroll
up!"
39. You know more about your MSN friends' daily routines than you
do your own spouses'.
40. You have an identity crisis if someone is using a screen name
close to your own.