SYSTEM UPGRADE - HELP!!!
Dear Tech Support (Male Version),
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed
that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up
a lot of space and valuable resources. No mention of this
phenomenon was included in the product brochure.
In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and
launches during system initialization, where it monitors all other
system activity. Applications such as Card Night 10.3, Boys Night
2.5 and Saturday Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system
whenever selected.
I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting
to run some of my other favourite applications, I am thinking about
going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but uninstall does not work on this
program. Can you help me PLEASE!
Dear User,
This is a very common problem that men complain about but it is
mostly due to a primary misconception.
Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea
that Wife 1.0 is merely a "UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT" program.
Wife 1.0 is an "OPERATING SYSTEM" and designed by its creator to
run everything.
It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still
convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating files within your
system would cause Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0, so nothing
is gained. It is impossible to uninstall, delete or purge the
program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to
Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this. Some
have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0, but end up with
more problems than the original system. Look in your manual under
"Warnings - Alimony/Child Support".
I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation.
Having Wife 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the
entire section regarding general partner faults (GPF). You must
assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might occur,
regardless of their cause.
The best course of action will be to enter the command
C:\APOLOGIZE. In any case, avoid excessive use of the "ESC" key
because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command
before the operating system will return to normal. The system will
run smoothly as long as you take the blame for all the GPF's.
Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high maintenance. Consider
buying additional software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0.
I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Chocolates 5.0. DO NOT, under any
circumstances, install Secretary with Short Skirt 3.3. This is not
a supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause
irreversible damage to the operating system. Oh and one more thing.
Avoid borrowing other people's older Girlfriend programmes because
some have undetectable viruses in them. These viruses can spread
via your hard drive or floppy disk and affect your Wife 1.0
operating system so badly that you may end up having to purchase a
completely new computer and operating system.
Dear Tech Support (Female Version),
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed
that the new program began making unexpected changes to the
accounting modules, limiting access to flower and jewellery
applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In
addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs,
such as Hot-sex 1.0 and Romance 9.9 but installed undesirable
programs such as NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0. Conversation 8.0 no longer
runs and HouseCleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried
running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
Desperate Wife.
Dear Desperate Wife,
Keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while
Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
Try to enter the command: C:/I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and install
Tears 6.2. Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the
applications: Guilty 3.0 and Flowers 7.0. But remember, overuse can
cause Husband 1.0 to default to GrumpySilence 2.5, Happyhour 7.0 or
Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create "Snoring
Loudly" wave files.
DO NOT install MotherInLaw 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend
program. These are not supported applications and will crash
Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have
limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. Consider
buying additional software to improve performance. I personally
recommend HotFood 3.0, Lingerie 5.3 and Keep-a-nice-body 10.1
