Hi guy n gals, im new here,english is not my native language but
nonetheless, i try to make myself understood.Im age 20 yrs old male
just finish my poly studies now finding a job while w8ting for
national service.
Ok i had a problem with wanking or masturbation, quite big of a
probem here.The problem is i cannot control myself to stop wanking,
despite countless attempts.u see , masturbation had affected me in
many ways for example, i forget things easily, if some1 give me
instructions to do smth i may forget wad he had said earlier even
if it was just a few secs ago.also i have very low confidence with
myself, keep doubting whether i am able or have the ability to
finish a task or not.In addition, I am very concious about wad
other ppl would think of me every moment.
Also my legs especially the knee area would without fail have
'cracking sound' eveytime i stand up, and i feel my heart not
beating properly sometimes,but i still kena pes A,lol....went to do
a electro cardiogram,to check the heart beat, it turns out there is
no problem.so i think is my wanking problem.but the most important
thing is dat it had affected my studies alot.alot alot.
I would wank only 3 times a week now,used to be more in the past
about 5 times a week.After every wanking session, i would feel very
guilty and very low.all the negative feelings come back.low self
esteem etc etc.
Despite knowing dat it would do more harm, why does it
make me still want to wank?I would think of all the consequences if
i wank,and is like a battle raging in my head, to wank or not?part
of me wanted to have the pleasure but another is saying no,u cnt do
this man.MOst of the time 80% i give in to the temptation.after
every1 is aslp i on my laptop ,n surf porn.n wank..after wank feel
sibei sian tired ,dick very tired,i look into the mirror n feel as
if i look like cock.so i promise myself it would be the last time i
wank.
OK then after 2 days later i feel fking horny, go into the
toilet to stimualte my dick make it steam have the near climax
feeling but nvr ejaculate out la.wanted to but scared would regret.
IN the end still cum out cnt tahan the pressure building up.after
dat i feel honestly like shit. despite all the bad things it
do to my mind and my soul why the fk i still do it?I feel im not
matured enuf to control my own self.undescipline in many ways
I used to have a galfriend but after 8 mths i lose her,fking
sad.so i thought to myself i nid to change my life man,n most
probably my wanking habit is the cause of the prob.i nvr told her
abt my this wanking prob,i scared she would be disgusted at me.so i
keep mum abt it.sigh....
life goes on man,now trying hard to find back myself again, i
dun want to let wanking control my life man..I noe im sexually
addicted to wanking.and i think im the only guy in spore to have
this prob.its been going for 6yrs or more trying to stop this
problem.ever since sec 2 i have been trying.and im going to try to
stop it.i still optimistic about it though.i nid to dig deep within
myself.
hope u guys have any suggestions or any tips on how to stop.i
tdy no wank.see how tmr if i can hold on.
peace.
WankerG
