Imagine this scenario: You and your dream lover are naked in bed
together. Then, all of a sudden, a stranger barges into the room
with a gun. You've just lost all interest in sex, and now the only
plan you have for your privates is keeping them out of harm's way.
In short, you've reprioritized your activities as a survival
instinct.
This is an extreme example, but any kind of stress -- whether
related to work, relationships or any other area of life -- that
preoccupies someone is going to diminish that person's sex drive.
In order to have a healthy libido, one has to be engaged in the
moment -- not angry or hurt. For example, says Milsten, "If you're
having shouting matches with your partner," your libido is nearly
certain to take a nosedive. Fortunately, if you work on your
differences and good feelings are restored, sex drive is likely to
return to baseline levels.
Some problems, however, such as depression or anxiety, intense
job stress, family worries, serious marital conflicts, experiences
of past abuse or conflicts about sexual orientation may require
professional assistance. It is essential to seek such help if
negative feelings interfere with the rest of life, if they are
overwhelming, or if you are no longer able to experience
pleasure.
