dunno if u guys go read this before, just wanna share it.
What do i want for a
first date?
AhÂ…the start of the new semester. The season of new acquaintances
and a whole lot of raging hormones. Be surrounded by the sweet
sweet scent of blooming romances. Take a good look around campus,
and you'll find it all too easy to have your gaze locked on that
sweet young face. It's no surprise that the 'phenomenon' is taken
up a notch with the incessant SDU-backed freshmen orientation
camps.
First it was love at first sight followed by an ensuing round of
mind games over MSN.
Then comes the big kahuna - the First Date.
First date jitters happens to everyone. If you beg to differ,
you're in self-denial my friend. Women are harsh critics, and being
critical is exactly what we do on first dates. Having been a victim
of one-too-many catastrophic first-dates-I-wished-never-happened, I
see it as my ecclesiastical duty to dispense with 5 big mistakes
men make.
1. Sight
It will be much appreciated if you could talk to me where my face
is. Most guys probably don't know this, but our cleavages don't
actually make conversations with you. We like to think that our
face is decent enough to garner your attention. And if you don't
know already, a spaced out expression coupled with really slow
speech (it doesn't help that your head is tilted slightly
downwards) gives it away.
Also, not that I mind having dinner at Hooters (they have great
wings!), but it can get a tad distracting when your face wanders
off in the direction of a passing Hooters girl. Forgive us for that
invigorating splash of water in the face
Keep your date in sight. If you don't show that she's worthy of
your limited attention span, what makes you think she'll be
sympathetic enough to sit through an entire evening of
self-flattery you subconsciously throw at her.
2. Smell
I know you had a long day hugging other men at Rugby training, or
probably worked your ass off babysitting elephants at the Zoo on
your holiday internship. When women say they like the smell of a
man who's just had a workout, it's usually because it reminded them
of that sweltering night of passion. It's a first date; I don't
know you well enough to take on that pungent chauvinistic odour
just yet.
On the other end of the spectrum, unless you're European and still
hasn't gotten used to the idea of taking daily showers in the
Southern hemisphere, it's not that fantastic an idea to douse
yourself in a tub of eau de parfum. Believe me, it might smell like
a whiff of alluring musky scent to you, but it's really more like
an overbearing tsunami wave of nauseating pungency.
Don't be afraid to use them nozzles, just be gentle with it. Do use
deodorants or perfumes, but try not to get yourself in the Guinness
book of records by finishing a bottle a day (or knocking your first
dates unconscious).
3.Hear
It's a universal rule: no religion, politics or money. As much as
you think most girls enjoy listening to you giving a glowing report
of your assets and cash reserves in the bank, we really don't. If
you're out on a date with a gold-digger, you don't need to impress
her with subtleties. Feel free to be the pimp you are with your big
fur coat, your blinging gold chains and just lit up your cigarette
with a flaming note.
But if your first date is someone nice, and you care to make it a
sweet experience that will gain you the ticket to date number two,
lay off the boasting. It's one thing to tell her more about
yourself; it's another to tell her that you drove your 1-week old
Lamborghini into the sea because you didn't like the colour of
it.
It's usually quite hard for men to do this, but hold on to your
ego. I'm sure you have wonderful stories to tell, but when it's her
turn to speak her mind, let her finish! Nothing gets on a girl's
nerves more than not being able to complete a 7-word sentence
without being interrupted every 2 secs.
Sure you just got out of rehab, was a full on cocaine addict in
college and indulges in Japanese porn and torturing little animals
in your free time, but really, is there a need to scare your date
off in the first 10 mins into the meal? Hearing a detailed account
of how you dissected your pet rabbit while it was twitching to a
slow death doesn't make my grilled fish taste any better. Don't get
me wrong, the bad boy James Dean thing still works, but mutilation
just doesn't rock my world. Keep the conversation light-hearted,
and save the gory anecdotes on that last meal before you tell her
the relationship's over dude.
Lastly, one thing a guy shouldn't be is too be too accommodating -
or nice. I never believe that nice guys finish last, but don't be
too much of a sure-dear-anything-you-say-dear kind of a guy. "I
love travelling", "me too", "I love rabbits" " Me too", " I love
tampons" "Me too". C'mon, I know you can be eager to please your
date, but trying to impose shared interests can get really
loserish. It can get quite fuming when you agree with everything we
say, or insist we make every decision. Girls like surprises. Make
intriguing choices, challenge the convictions we state over dinner.
Demonstrate that you're an affirmative man worthy of her.
4. Taste
Seriously, contrary to popular belief, we don't need some fancy
restaurant where the entrees start at $50, and the only water they
serve is sparkling water from some European spring. It only goes to
make the date uncomfortable and unnatural. It also shows that
you're one helluva showy guy.
I'm not suggesting MacDonald's, the food court or Hooter's either
(hell, they really do have great wings!). That just spells
cheap.
It could be a nice picnic at the botanical gardens, or an exotic
meal at Arab Street. Skip the usual Swenson's or NYDC where every
orientation group is hanging out at in hoards. It just kills the
romance with the mundanely of it.
5.Touch
Ah, a touch of the skin that sends an electrifying tremble up the
spine. A light touch of the arm does wonders. So hold on to your
dick and keep your hands to yourself you perv. You can jack off to
Hentai when you get home. You know how they say girls like a man's
strong touch? You've probably got it in all the wrong places my
sexually deprived homosapien friend.
Like I said, it's a first date, we don't know you that well to be
comfortable with your hand on my bum all night. Light touched on
the elbow or arm would be sufficient for the girl to feel secure.
And if the feeling's right, go on and hold her hand, and that sweet
touch might build up to a sensual first kiss by the end of the
night.
So lads, I'm assuming your first date is a self-respecting girl
worthy of your attention - I'm also assuming you have good taste.
If you're dating an SPG, the hall whore or the horny freshmen, the
rules above might not apply. There are no rules.
In any case, first dates should be fun, and more importantly, frays
the nerves.
You'll like each other more only when you're in a comfortable
setting and at ease with each other. No silly antics or trying too
hard to impress. She probably liked that cool cat in you before she
agreed to go on the date in the first place.
