ya know.... the other day i was having dinner with my friend and
her family. she has 5 siblings lah, and all except one were there
with the parents. i was just sitting there, waiting for the food
and tuning myself into their conversations. and i was watching her
father coax the 4 year old gal from crying. he even took her out
for a walk to freshen up. and that set me...... reflecting. a
lot.
i cant recall much of my childhood, but i know it was a simple
blissful time. i remembered pretending to be sleeping when father
drove and we're approaching the house, so that he can carry me
upstairs and i dun have to walk myself. i remember him making me
take off my scandals and urged me to build a sand fortress with my
cousins and brothers. i remembered his motocycle rides to school. i
remembered the times my brothers and i were soaked to the bone
travelling behind his pickup in the rain.
i cannot remember when things started to change. i cannot remember
if i changed first or he changed first. but i resented it. i find
myself wanting that father back.
ya know... i really envy that friend of mine. she's got a really
cool family with really cool parents. i know, because i spoke to
her mum. i wished my family was like that.
ok, enuff of the mush... it's getting late, think i'm turning in
soon. 
