Your response, I believe are quite normal, and your demands from
your good friends and your ai ai has a clear distinction...
If I were you, I'd throw out the same response... I have two
suggestion for you, you can decide to forget about what has
happened and go to the other direction from your friend or
room-mate who has typically hurt you one way or another and remain
silent about it, coz I am sure that with her behaviour you have
just mentioned, she will not approach you for you giving her the
cold shoulder...
No.2, talk to her about what you think of her, but of course, in a
gentle manner... tell her your dislikes and tell her when you feel
that she has pushed your buttons too much... if you do not reveal
yourself to her, your secret identity, she will be misled and
continuously treat you as a 'never mind, she won't mind' kind of
person...
