I feel that your mom doesn't really need you there except for
company and to settle a few issues.
The only reason why she doesn't want to move to Melbourne is
because she's bored? Frankly, you have to think of your
future. It will be hard to expect you to move back to
Singapore and be happy if you're accustomed to the lifestyle
here. Boredom can be easily solved, but career, pace of life
and employee benefits are things that you really need to
consider.
Your mom has to learn to be independant. She's playing the
"I need you, daughter!" card and making you feel guilty.
I'd say take a few months to return and
be with her, but you do have to consider, in the long run, would
you and your husband prefer to live in Melbourne, or in
Singapore?
Thank God my mom is independant. She and dad are enjoying
their semi-retirement and they relish the idea of me being over
here so that when I eventually get my own place, they can come and
stay with me now and then. She and dad have foresight too and
they are saying stuff like maybe in future, I can help my bro and
his family migrate here when life in Singapore becomes
unbearable. And I've told her that when my baby niece grows
up, if she wants to, she can come over to Melbourne to study and
I'll look after her food and lodging.
Sometimes, you have to learn to be firm. It's not that
you're being unfilial but you can take care of your mom over here
just the same. She has to consider that you and your husband
have your entire lives ahead of you!
Besides, look around you - there are many Asian grandma's and
grandpa's who moved here with their children and they somehow
manage to find their own niche here.
Think about this carefully. Do you really want to give it
all up to return to Singapore? It's not cheap to move there
and back and vice versa.
Hi Rhonda
Thanx for the thots. Actually mum has always been independent.
She traveIs frequently for work and has always been very active;
shopping, yoga, facial and all the girly works. It is hard when
someone whom she has spent more than half of her lifetime with
is gone. (I am also taking it hard.)
Have been reflecting lots recently. I used to place too
much emphasis on being an achiever. Having a good career and
earning money. My parents made all these possible.They gave us the
best in life, giving us a headstart, making us mobile.
It took me years to build a life here. Giving it up will not be
easy. But like what hubby said, it's how we adapt and make
something out of the circumstances. Career can be
built anywhere, even if one has to start all over again. Money
can be earn anytime anywhere. All these are within our
control. One thing that is not in our control, i.e. Tomorrow
may not be.
It is not too much to give up for mum who has done so much for
us. Knowing her, she will never want any of her children to
sacrifice and be unhappy.
Like my aunt said, I am the bitchy one 
in the family (a professional ailment), so its
easier for me to get things done, esp the lawyers that have been
giving mum the run around.
