robot:to top up your balance, please say top up. to check you
balance, please say check balance
me: check balance
robot: did you say check balance? if you did, please say
yes...
me: yes
robot: what is your password
me: XXXX
robot: please hold on........your balance is $XX.XX. if you would
like to blah blah...please say blah blah...if you would like to
blah blah blah, please say blah blah blah, if you would like me to
shut up and give you some peace, please say end
me: end 
but at least this is ok. my dad once had to spend 10+ minutes going
through pressing this number and that number. and at the end of
it...he still ended up talking to a machine!!!!!!!