CORPORATE LESSON 1
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing
up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps
herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door,
there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word,
Bob says, 'I'll give you $800 dollars to drop that towel."
After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and
stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her
$800 dollars and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and
goes back upstairs. When she get to the bathroom, her husband asks,
"Who was that?"
"It was Bob the next door neighbor" she replies.
"Great!" the husband says. "Did he say anything about the $800
he owes me?"
Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining
to the credit and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be
in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.
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CORPORATE LESSON 2
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are
walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it
and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just
one wish."
"Me first! Me first!" says the admin. clerk. "I want to be in
the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world."
Poof! She's gone.
"Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii,
relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply
of Pina Coladas and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone.
"OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager. The manager
says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."
Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.
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CORPORATE LESSON 3
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A rabbit
asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day
long?"
The crow answered, "Sure, why not?"
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. A
fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be
sitting very high up.
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CORPORATE LESSON 4
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to
get to the top of that tree", sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got
the energy."
"Well, why don't you nibble on my droppings?" replied the bull.
"They're packed with nutrients."
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him
enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next
day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the
top of the tree. Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the
turkey out of the tree.
Moral of the story: Bull.Shit. might get you to the top, but it
won't keep you there.
