The Men's Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this
all down
Finally, the guys' side of the story. (I must
admit, it's pretty good)
We always hear "the rules" from the female side.
Now here are the
rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note, these are all numbered "1" ON
PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT
mind readers.
(FIRST & FOREMOST RULE)
1. Learn to work the toilet
seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
down.
We need it up, you need it
down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving
it down.
1. Sunday sports, it’s like the full moon or the
changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just tell us what you want!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to
almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want
help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are
for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible
in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after
7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two
ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other
one
1. You can either ask us to do
something
Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you
already know best how to do it, just do it
yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you
have to say during commercials, because we don't disturb you while
you are watching your soaps and serials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions
and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows
default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color.
Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve
is.
1. If it itches, it will be
scratched.
We all do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing,"
We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth
the hassle. !
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer
to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely
anything you wear is fine... Really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless
you are prepared to discuss such topics as Racing or
Football.
1. 1 You have enough clothes.
1. 2 You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape! Round IS a
shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch
tonight;
