One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says to Mike
behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a
doctor."
"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies.
"There's a diagnostic computer at the drugstore at the corner. Just
give it a urine sample and the computer'll tell you what's wrong
and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten
dollars...a hell of a lot cheaper than a doctor."
So Jack deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to the
drugstore. He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and
asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and
waits.
Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: You have tennis
elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It
will improve in two weeks.
That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was,
Jack began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some
tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife
and daughter, and masturbated into the mixture for good
measure.
Jack hurries back to the drugstore, eager to check the results. He
deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the
results.
The computer prints the following:
1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3. Your daughter has herpes... her boyfriend gave it to her. Get a
doctor.
4. Your wife is pregnant... twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a
lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never
get better.
