Andre was bragging to his boss one day. "You know, I know
everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know
them." Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff. "OK, Andre
how about George Clooney?" Andre replied: "Sure, yes, Tom and I are
old friends, and I can prove it."
So Andre and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on George
Clooney's door and sure enough, George Clooney shouts: "Andre!
Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for
lunch!"
Although impressed, Andre's boss is still sceptical. After they
leave Clooney's house, he tells Andre that he thinks him knowing
Clooney was just lucky. "No, no, just name anyone else," Andre
says. "President Bush," his boss quickly retorts. "Yes," Andre
says, "I know him, let's fly out to Washington." And off they
go.
At the White House, Clinton spots Andre on the tour and motions him
and his boss over, saying, "Andre, what a surprise, I was just on
my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's
have a cup of coffee first and catch up."
Well, the boss is very shaken by now but still not totally
convinced.
After they leave the White House grounds he expresses his doubts to
Andre, who again implores him to name anyone else. "The Pope," his
boss replies.
"Sure!" says Andre. "My folks are from Poland, and I've known the
Pope a long time." So off they fly to Rome. Andre and his boss are
assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Andre says, "This
will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these
people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go
upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope." And he
disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican. Sure enough,
half an hour later Andre emerges with the Pope on the balcony, but
by the time Andre returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart
attack and is surrounded by paramedics.
Working his way to his boss's side, Andre asks him, "What
happened?" His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you
and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said:
"Who the fuck's that on the balcony with Andre?"
