1. When his 38-calibre
revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in
Long Beach , California, would-be robber James Elliot did something
that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried
the trigger again. This time it worked.
2. The chef at a hotel in
Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting machine and, after a
little shopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company.
The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a
look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger.
The chef’s claim was approved.
3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his
car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find
a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.
4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus
driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be
transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to
admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and
offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the
passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the
patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The
deception wasn’t discovered for 3 days.
5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from
serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how
he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply
trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train
before he was hit.
6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the
counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash
drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the
register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash
from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The
total amount of cash he got from the drawer… $15. [If someone
points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed?]
7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He
decided that he’d just throw a cinder block through a liquor store
window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and
heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced
back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him
unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The
whole event was caught on videotape.
8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a
man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately,
and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the
snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They
put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then
taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To
which he replied, “Yes, officer, that’s her. That’s the lady I
stole the purse from.”
9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked
into a Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan , at 5 A.M., flashed a
gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said
he couldn’t open the cash register without a food order. When the
man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren’t available for
breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.
10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home
parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for.
Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next
to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that
the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon
hose into the motor home’s sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the
vehicle declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh
he’d ever had.
