Ethel was a bit of a demon in her wheelchair, and loved to
charge around the nursing home, taking corners on one wheel and
getting up to maximum speed on the long corridors. Because the poor
woman was one sandwich short of a picnic, the other residents
tolerated her, and some of the males actually joined in.
One day, Ethel was speeding up one corridor when a door opened
and Kooky Clarence stepped out with his arm outstretched. "STOP!"
he shouted in a firm voice. Have you got a license for that thing?"
Ethel fished around in her handbag and pulled out a Kit Kat wrapper
and held it up to him.
"OK" he said, and away Ethel sped down the hall. As she took the
corner near the TV lounge on one wheel, Weird Harold popped out in
front of her and shouted "STOP!" Have you got proof of insurance?"
Ethel dug into her handbag pulled out a drink coaster and held it
up to him. Harold nodded and said Carry on, ma'am."
As Ethel neared the final corridor before the front door, Crazy
Craig stepped out in front of her, stark naked, holding his Captain
Happy in> his hand. "Oh, good grief," said Ethel, "Not the
breathalyzer again!"
