Farmer John had just walked into the local watering hole, when
who should he see, but his old friend Chris the tractor salesman
sitting up at the bar. Chris looked so down and dejected, that John
just had to go up and say something to him.
"Say, Chris, how ya doing? How's the tractor selling business these
days?"
If Chris had looked sad before, at the mention of tractor sales,
his face sank even more, and a tear came to his eye.
"John," he said, shaking his head, "I don't know what it is. I
can't sell a tractor these days to save my life. I'll tell you, I
just gotta sell one tractor and soon, or else I'll lose that
dealership for good."
"Well," John said, taking the barstool next to him, "If you think
you got it bad, I got it worse. Now you listen to this. I went out
to the barn the other morning to milk Bessy. That ol' cow gets more
ornery as the years go by. Anyway, no sooner did I sit down on the
milking stool and get to work, but ol' Bes starts a slappin' me
with her tail. After a minute or so, I got fed up with it, so I
threw a rope up over the rafters, and tied ol' Bessy's tail to the
rafters. Then I got back to work. I didn't even get two squirts
into the bucket, when Bes gives me a kick. Knocked me clean off the
stool! Boy, did that upset me! So I get me another rope an' tie
Bessy's right hind leg to the side of the milking stall, and get a
started trying to milk her again. Well by this time, Bessy's about
livid, and she doesn't want any part of it, so she let's me have it
with her other hind leg. I wasn't about to give in to this ol' cow,
so I got me yet another piece of rope and tied up Bessy's left leg
to the other side of the stall."
Just then John paused to take a sip his beer. Chris, distracted for
a moment from his own troubles, asked John, "Well, did you finally
get to milk her?"
"Well, yes and no, Chris. But I'll tell ya what, if you can
convince my wife that I was out there to MILK that cow, I'll BUY a
tractor from ya!"
