A Scotsman was shipwrecked and finally washed ashore on a small
island.
As he regains consciousness on the beach, he sees a beautiful
unclad nymphet standing over him. She asks, "Would you like some
food?"
The Scot hoarsely croaks, "Och, lassie, I havna' ittin a bite in a
week noo and I am verra hungry!"
She disappears into the woods and quickly comes back with a heaping
helping of haggis. When he has choked it down, she asks, "Would you
like something to drink?"
"Och, aye! That haggis has made me verra hungry and I wad verra
much like a drink!"
She goes off into the woods again and returns with a bottle of
75-year-old single-malt Scotch whiskey. The Scotsman is beginning
to think that he's in heaven when the unclad nymphet leans closer
and says, "Would you like to play around?"
"Och, lassie, don't tell me ye've got a golf course here too!"