The AL GORE virus: causes your computer to just keep
counting.
The CLINTON virus: gives you a 7-inch hard drive with NO
memory.
The BOB DOLE (AKA: VIAGRA) virus: makes a new hard drive out of an
old floppy.
The LEWINSKY virus: sucks all the memory out of your computer, then
e- mails everyone about what it did.
The RONALD REAGAN virus: saves your data, but forgets where it is
stored.
The JESSE JACKSON virus: warns you constantly about illegitimate
file reproduction, while illegitimately reproducing files in the
background.
The MIKE TYSON virus: quits after two bytes.
The OPRAH WINFREY virus: your 300 MB hard drive shrinks to 100 MB,
then slowly expands to restabilize around 200 MB.
The JACK KEVORKIAN virus: deletes all old files.
The PROZAC virus: totally screws up your RAM, but your processor
doesn't care.
The Micheal Jackson virus: only attacks minor files.
The ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER virus: terminates some files, leaves, but
will be back.
and last but not least ...
The LORENA BOBBITT virus: reformats your hard drive into a 3.5-inch
floppy, then discards it through Windows
