A drunk gets up from the bar and heads for the bathroom. A few
minutes later, a loud, blood curdling scream is heard coming from
the bathroom. A few minutes after that, another loud scream
reverberates through the bar.
The bartender goes into the bathroom to investigate why the drunk
is screaming."
What's all the screaming about in there?" he yells. "You're scaring
my customers!"
"I'm just sitting here on the toilet," slurs the drunk, "and every
time I try to flush, something comes up and squeezes the hell out
of my nuts ."
The bartender opens the door, looks in, and says, "You idiot!
You're sitting on the mop bucket!"