MArry China Wife

last SG · 2009-05-23T22:45:38+00:00

If they are all good girls, does that mean you are a bad guy? no lah it means he wants you to pin a medal on his chest and kiss his forehead

angel7030 SG

A couple of things about this topic.

On page 1, a member pointed out that SG girls make ok friends, but not good wives.

One thing about wealthy and educated countries is that it tends to benefit the women the most. They go from low education and housework to having univeristy education and the choice of many professions. It doesnt change much for men.

So in SG, SG women find themselves equal or higher than the men, hence the achievers often flock to those they perceive as being higher- white men.

Last weekend had a double spread on some of Singapore's Miss Singapore winners. Only Jamie Teo married an Asian. They rest were either still single or married Caucasians.

The "Rise of the Women", so to speak, has also affected white men. That's why millions of the poorer, older and lower class white men have married Thais and Philippinos. They are also marrying hundreds of thousands of PRC's in China too. (50,000 in 2006, 70,000 in 2007).

Equality for women in wealthy countries has really played a role in changing things.

Men in countries like Singapore have to marry those from poor countries in order to marry down.

More and more educated Asian women are marrying up.....to Ang Mohs.

But is this really a problem, or just a shift in behaviour we should all just accept?

why must we go for ang mo when we got taiwan, korea and jap handsome hunk around, i dun mind even a good looking thai man or malaysia man, so to speak, so dun alway hv the blue print of Ang mo ang mo ang mo...why?? u cannot match the ang mo is it??

Fantagf SG

There u see, i already said this kind of topic mei wan mei liao

I believe TS started this thread for flaming

The Jolly Kiasu SG

I know you meant it is an insult to me, but I think what you said about "matching the ang moh" is true.

Many Singaporeans guys cant match Ang Moh's, at least the expat ones, because they have the American and British culture backing them, and they have higher paid and positioned jobs, and they are often nicer, friendlier, more outgoing, physically bigger and more worldly.

In contrast, Singaporeran guys are skinnier, shorter, nerdier (most guys wear glasses and study, play role playing games and play hardly any sports) are locked into this tiny island, and are often spoilt by their mothers and maids.

Are there outgoing confident Singaporean guys around?

Sure.

But not many compared to Ang Moh's.

That's why so many Mediacorp women and most of the Miss Singapore's married Ang Moh's.

And it's my expereince that Singaporean ladies who are educated and make it to senior management or above usually have dated ang moh's at least once or twice, and have many of them in their circle of friends.

This is just my own opinion, but I think the only Singaporean guys who have the social clout to match the Ang Moh's are doctors. But there's not many of them, and they are usually snapped up by pretty girls during university or soon after graduation.

jojobeach SG

shldnt u feel sori for the SG gers as well?

Coz if SG men only go for, or are only able to find socially and economically disadvantaged wife, doesnt that make the remaining SG gers left over on the shelves awaiting expiry dates?

with the exception of rare picks by angmo or wat ever u deem superior....

kinda mean u are a losser if u marry, or doom to be a old hag if u dun....

Actually at one point I do feel sorry for the SG gals too.

When I dated SG men while I was in SG.

I noticed one thing.

They needed to feel superior to their gal.

If the gal has money.. has a good education. What else is there for SG men to offer her gal ?

And the mommy's boy syndrome... that is just difficult.

GHoST_18 SG

jojobeach SG

I know you meant it is an insult to me, but I think what you said about "matching the ang moh" is true.

Are there outgoing confident Singaporean guys around?

Sure.

But not many compared to Ang Moh's.

That's why so many Mediacorp women and most of the Miss Singapore's married Ang Moh's.

"In contrast, Singaporeran guys are skinnier, shorter, nerdier (most guys wear glasses and study, play role playing games and play hardly any sports) are locked into this tiny island, and are often spoilt by their mothers and maids."

All these listed.. can change. But are the guys willing to change ?

Meat Pao SG

Most men do not mind marrying a wife who is of a lower socio-economic status.

This is different with women. Most women would mind marrying someone who is not their equal.

For men, they will think about beauty, compatibility, family acceptance, same values, and then educational/ financial status. All this is considered at the same time, and if other things are good, pass in good score, while the educational/ financial status is not having a good score, then most men would be willing to accept that.

I think this is different with women who would place educational/ financial status at a higher level priority.

So that is why for you gals out there, dont be surprised and look down on men who marry "downwards", because men's thinking is different. For men, it is implied and ingrained that men should be the dominant person and should persue career and status, so in his mind, he is looking for a "supporter" or a "companion" while a woman's mind is looking for a "protector" or a "guardian". It's a different kind of thinking and different positioning based on each gender's roles and values, which is ingrained.

So that is why I dont look down on men who marry "mail-order-brides" as long as they are serious and they can establish a harmonious family.

My only objection is people who marry Thai and Viet brides, because I am a bit racist.

The Jolly Kiasu SG

All these listed.. can change. But are the guys willing to change ?

Yeah, that's a good point.

Thing is, there are very few role modles for Singaporean guys.

Malays are actually pretty good in this regard. Their culture is very relaxed and confident. I've seen Malay guys tell off Ang Moh's without blinking an eye, unlike the timid Chinese Singaporean guy.

But Chinese look down on Malays.

And half the shows are hosted by overseas born Eurasians, so it indirectly implies that Singaporean Chinese guys arent cool.

Saying they have to change is one thing. But they need to know what to change, and then need someone to guide and teach and set an example.

Can you think of any guy wo'd be a good example jojo?

Meat Pao SG

Being skinny and nerdy is due to environment.

Due to not enough land, space is cramped, people cannot excercise so much, and spent too much time in near-work activities (reading, computer) which results in near-sightedness and nerdiness.

Singapore is a high value knowledge economy, everybody is stressed, everybody need to load up on knowledge (high studies hours, even plus tuition) which continues even after working life (work until late in night).

If you want to see more people excercising and moving away from nerdiness, first and foremost the environment must change. If Singapore economy is still dependant on knowledge economy, nothing will change. Unless if tomorrow Singapore finds oil field near Sentosa island or something like that. Then Singapore populace can relax a bit.

jojobeach SG

Yeah, that's a good point.

Thing is, there are very few role modles for Singaporean guys.

Malays are actually pretty good in this regard. Their culture is very relaxed and confident. I've seen Malay guys tell off Ang Moh's without blinking an eye, unlike the timid Chinese Singaporean guy.

But Chinese look down on Malays.

And half the shows are hosted by overseas born Eurasians, so it indirectly implies that Singaporean Chinese guys arent cool.

Saying they have to change is one thing. But they need to know what to change, and then need someone to guide and teach and set an example.

Can you think of any guy wo'd be a good example jojo?

Honestly..I can't find any good example in Singapore.

But that notion about " If the gal loves you .. she will accept your every flaw". That has to go first. Because in a man-woman relationship.. that just doesn't work.

For a human being to fall in love.. and stay in love. They need to have a reason to love.

I just don't understand why guys are so unwilling to be externally attractive to gals ?

Sure mommys says.. she must love you for who you are. But if she wasn't attracted to you externally in the first place.. what makes guys think he will have a chance to show her his inner beauty ?

i believe Asian guys can be attractive . If they want to. But most are simply too lazy.

jojobeach SG

Most men do not mind marrying a wife who is of a lower socio-economic status.

This is different with women. Most women would mind marrying someone who is not their equal.

I think this is different with women who would place educational/ financial status at a higher level priority.

So that is why I dont look down on men who marry "mail-order-brides" as long as they are serious and they can establish a harmonious family.

My only objection is people who marry Thai and Viet brides, because I am a bit racist.

The world is changing.

As third world countries in our region becomes more economically viable. There will be less women whom will fall into the categories men sought after.

Perhaps not in our generation.. but in the future.. Sg guys will need to find wifes in Africa.

jojobeach SG

Being skinny and nerdy is due to environment.

Due to not enough land, space is cramped, people cannot excercise so much, and spent too much time in near-work activities (reading, computer) which results in near-sightedness and nerdiness.

I don't think being nerdy and externally unattractive is all environmental.

Sure.. that's the easiest excuse.

Can an intelligent guy be well groomed and attractive ? Sure.. it's all about lifestyle choices.

The Jolly Kiasu SG

Honestly..I can't find any good example in Singapore.

But that notion about " If the gal loves you .. she will accept your every flaw". That has to go first. Because in a man-woman relationship.. that just doesn't work.

For a human being to fall in love.. and stay in love. They need to have a reason to love.

I just don't understand why guys are so unwilling to be externally attractive to gals ?

Sure mommys says.. she must love you for who you are. But if she wasn't attracted to you externally in the first place.. what makes guys think he will have a chance to show her his inner beauty ?

i believe Asian guys can be attractive . If they want to. But most are simply too lazy.

I actually disagree with you about the flaws. I think both men and women have to open their minds and accept that both have flaws, to accept the good with the bad. I think both have expectations of the opposite sex that are really very difficult to find.

One thing about women becoming more educated is that they are not so willing to accept flaws anymore since their expectations have risen in line with their education and professions. SInce they essentially live, speak and do the same things as the men, they arent going to find a very different "higher" Singaporean guy very easily. Hence they turn to Ang Moh's.

Men, on the other hand, have increased their expectations of how a woman should look and behave. The internet hasnt helped- while women are supposed to act like virgins, they are also expected to be sexual dynamos at the same time and know how to act like American porn stars (and take it on the face, if you know what I mean).

The mother's havent helped either.

I agree with you about guys needing to smarten up and look good. I'm quite aware of this cuz I'm overweight and fighting a losing battle with my tummy :(

I know one guy who I knew as an acquaintance. Very nerdy church guy. Bowl haircut, thin, shy. Didnt see him for about a year. Next time I saw him I literally did a double take- He still wore the loser gold rimmed glasses, but he bulked up massively. He was just like Arnie. If he wore contacts or did lasik, he'd have been awesome.

But you know what jojo? I think it's going to be hard for Singaporean guys to smarten up their looks. I know a lot of Singaporeans dont like Hong Kong style of fashion, and most guys would be too scared to let their hair grow longer.

jojobeach SG

The mother's havent helped either.

I agree with you about guys needing to smarten up and look good. I'm quite aware of this cuz I'm overweight and fighting a losing battle with my tummy :(

Singaproean guys really need to find themselves a niche in the relationship market. It's either they evolve or be left behind.

Girls don't need guys Hong Kong high fashion nor long hair to be attractive.

Singaporean guys have this very distinctive aura of insecurities about them.. that makes them less attractive in a manly sense. And dressing up nerdy , hoping for the best.. ain't helping much either.

I really hope to see more well groomed males in our society.

If a guy can exude self-confidence.. he is attractive.

The biggest bane for SG guys are mommy boys. There are more mommy boys in our nation than those of ang mohs.

In ang moh countries.. there are also mommy boys.. and these are the men who has the bigger chances of getting divorced or left on the shelves.

Gals simply don't find mommy boys attractive at all.

The more mommy boys we have in Sg.. the less chances the relationship success rates of sg guys in SG.

Mothers are always good at teaching guys how to be a good son. Just they are not good at teaching their son how to be a good gf or husband.

Garyjob SG

Why no girl mentioned anything abt some SG girls (how many %, i dunno) that also go for male FTs also?????

And those male FTs they went for, sure have deep or very deep pockets....can i term/classify them (These type of SG girls) under the same category as those FT girls to SG men??????

Yup my guy friend from China leh, his ex-wife from Singapore. Apparently her family not happy he not making much money, forced them to divorce.

He now single in Singapore. Very shway leh.

Me.. I don't know, I think it is good to have a wife irregardless of nationality as long as she willing to commit the effort to make the partnership work too. But human is human, once after marriage might be 180 degree change in attitude. Guy the same, girl the same too..

I have a girl friend from China thinking of getting married with her. But yeh finance wise very siong ah. She has no earning ability. Me working on project to project basis. Sometimes no project also siong.

So what to do pray loh

Garyjob SG

aiyah, i just look down la..

esp those men who are doin well financially, they can easily find one of the equal status..

to me, FTs are generally for those who are at their verges liao, bo bian kind..

aiyah, dun noe la..

Perhaps it is due to love? My girl friend from China too and she is 4 years old than I am.

The Jolly Kiasu SG

Love?

bu ke yi! ;)

haha879 SG

The problem is a lot of SG girls refuse to lower their standards... despite not being up to 'standard' themselves. XD

aiya we watch americans show and their pplz look dam good...and we want gf or bf like them

96367366 SG

forgot sum of us r descents of mainlanders too huh?

we should look down on the ones look down on others.

jojobeach SG

forgot sum of us r descents of mainlanders too huh?

we should look down on the ones look down on others.

Yah.. we are all descendents of Cavepeople. So wat's yer point really ?

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