All over: Ashton has been forced to retire at the age of
26
So when the West Ham striker broke down in tears at the
club's Chadwell Heath training ground, his team-mates realised the
severity of his ankle injury.
Ashton's career was at an end. This talented striker,
just 26, should have been preparing for next summer's World
Cup.
Instead he will never play football again and, speaking
from his home in the Essex countryside yesterday, he admitted he
has yet to come to terms with that fact.
Four months after aborting his final attempt at a
recovery, Ashton's only concern is whether he will be able to walk
properly.
He was unable to jump properly and even had to change
the way he kicked a ball with his left foot.
He said: "After missing a whole year, I started last
season with two goals against Wigan and thought I was getting
there. But I started getting a new, funny feeling which then became
worse. I knew I was going to need a third operation.
"I had the op at the end of September and still had
hope. I then started getting another different feeling. I went over
to Holland to see a specialist. He said that I had a bit of bone
rubbing against my tendon and would need another op. My
fourth.
"In August of this year, I tried to join in with the
first team. I went to do a jog around the pitch but at the end of
second lap, I was struggling. The noise coming from my joint was
terrible.
"Kieron Dyer thought it was my boots making the noise.
I went to the side and was crying on the floor. This was the second
time I'd broken down in tears.
"I knew this was it. Definitely. My last chance had
gone.
"I was finished. The lads were all shocked and saddened
to see me like that.
"Generally, I don't show a lot of emotion so it was
probably strange to see a big lad like me crying. But I knew that
was it.
"I've not watched much football since then. Just
highlights, now and again, to see the goals. I haven't been to
Upton Park because while I knew I was retiring, other people didn't
and I didn't want to answer questions and lie.
"I'd like to think I had a chance of making the squad
for South Africa but to be honest, I hate thinking about
that.
"I will, of course, watch it and want England to win. I
fell in love with football when I watched Gary Lineker at the 1990
World Cup.
"The delay over these last few months was due to myself
and West Ham sorting out all the technicalities of me
retiring.
"I'd like to thank West Ham for all the time they have
spent on me and the fans have been terrific. I'm sad I could not
get back and play in front of them."
