Funniest Football Quotes

the Bear SG

Pete Gill of football365.com about Titus Bramble:

City of London fraud police have been too busy with other matters to spot the crime of the century: Bramble masquerading as a Premiership player for the past seven years.

anhydrouscoppersulphate SG

Laughing

monoslayer SG

lemme recall......

lampard defending is better than gerrard (or something like tat..) Laughing

the Bear SG

Fat Sam Allardyce on football players generally:

Players wouldn't know what to eat or drink after games unless you told them. Once you tell them and persist, then all of a sudden they find out it's the right thing to do.

the Bear SG

Adrian Chiles on MOTD2 after Titus Bramble's latest mistake:

If they released a Titus Bramble bloopers DVD, it would be four hours long.

the Bear SG

this is hilarious Laughing

Tranmere fans to Swansea - to the tune of Pink Floyd's Another Brick In The Wall:

Hey, Swansea... leave our sheep alone!

zocoss SG

Hey this one came from our very own Sgforum right... Laughing

turbo_drift SG

i think so. Laughing

lpx88 SG

Laughing

pierre^^ SG

i dun understand

wasnt stevie an attk midfiled like lam?

lpx88 SG

i think stevie can play as DM,MC, MR also

anhydrouscoppersulphate SG

ya gerrard started out as a DMC

crimson soldier SG

“it was a game of two halves”

the Bear SG

"I have, somewhat bizarrely, played more training sessions with England at left-back than in goal" - Robert Green reveals exactly where McLaren was going wrong.

Laughing

the Bear SG

"I'm not prone to outlandish predictions, but this club can establish itself in the top ten, the top eight of the Premier League" - Jewell, speaking to The Times on Thursday.

"If we are to stay in the Premier League, it'll be a miracle" - Jewell, speaking to The Times on Saturday.

Laughing

Kuali Baba SG

I've got lots. Gordon Strachan is a classic. Laughing

Reporter: Gordon, do you think James Beattie deserves to be in the English squad?
Strachan: I don't care, I'm Scottish.

Reporter: Gordon, if you were English, what formation would you play?
Strachan: If I were English, I'd top myself!

Kuali Baba SG

This is what greets the players and fans of Brighton and Cove Albion at their away matches:

"DOES YOUR BOYFRIEND KNOW YOU'RE HERE?"

Laughing

And this is for the Welsh, to the tune of 'Cym Rhondda':

"WHAT IS IT LIKE, WHAT IS IT LIKE?
WHAT'S IT LIKE TO SHAG A SHEEP?"

And for Chester City FC, to the tune of 'The Addams Family':

"YOUR MOTHER IS YOUR SISTER
YOUR FATHER IS YOUR BROTHER
YOU LIKE TO SHAG EACH OTHER
THE CHESTER FAMILY!"

Laughing

the Bear SG

Chester City sounds like The Aristocrats Twisted Evil

zocoss SG

Almunia says he and Lehmann do not even talk.

Asked how he thought the two keepers got on

Wenger laughed: They are going on holiday together next week. Laughing

Kuali Baba SG

Karren Brady, MD of Birmingham City FC, in 1994:

Footballers are only interested in drinking, clothes and the size of their willies.