anticipation.
anticipation tantalizes, anticipation heightens, anticipation
kills.
it had been two months since she last saw him, her hearts pounds
with anticipation as she awaits his presence in the cozy cafe. she
recalled their first meeting with great pleasure. she had been sent
to Hong Kong on a project just this summer and discovered that she
loved Hong Kong and its Pizza Huts, they are so much cheaper over
there that she indulged in eating that for lunch and dinner for the
first few weeks of her stay almost daily, the only grouse she had
was that they dont stock on the red chilli pepper they have in
Singapore.
that night as usual, she was having dinner alone and after placing
her order of personal Hawaiian pizza, soup, Pepsi and ice cream,
she sat back to wait for them to be delivered. suddenly a voice
asked, youre from Singapore? she turned her head in the
direction of the voice and her heart skipped a beat, yeah, how did
you know? she asked as she stared at the most gorgeous face she
has ever seen. a wild guess. im from Singapore too. he replied.
i would have never known, you dont speak like one. she answered.
how so? he asked. you sound Caucasian and your voice is really
melodious. she said shyly, trying very hard not to stare. do you
mind if i join you? it sucks having to have meals alone, ive been
doing that for the last week. he asked politely. she couldnt
believe her luck, a most gorgeous guy asking to join her, a brown
mouse, for dinner? casting her usual reserve aside, she said yes
meekly, almost happily, certainly happily.
honey, im sorry im late, an achingly familiar voice cuts into
her reminiscence. she turned her head and looked into the eyes of
the one man she loves beyond life. she was almost choked with
emotion and barely managed a its alright, youre not late, it was
me whos early. there was a slight awkwardness before he said
ive missed you so much these two months. he took her hand and
dragged her closer to him, necessitating her to move her chair
closer to him. i love you, he continued. i love you too and ive
missed you too, she replied, staring deeply into his eyes, trying
to gauge his reaction, he shifted his glance, she tugged her hand
away and he let her.
whats your decision? she asked the dreaded question. i love
you, i need you and i want you, for always. he replied, looking
earnestly into her eyes, trying to convince her of his sincerity
and love, she kept silent, felt a cold hand wrapping round her
heart. unable to stand her silence, he went on were getting
married at the end of the year. he looked at her, pleading for her
understanding. outwardly she maintained a facade of quiet dignity
and strength, in truth, her heart felt the cold grip of reality and
she wondered if people who suffered heart attacks felt as much pain
as she did.
why did you ask me out today? she questioned. i missed you badly
and i just needed to see you again, wont you reconsider? he
implored as he grasped both of her hands. she was tempted to laugh
in his face, instead she decided to do something else. closing the
gap between them, she kissed him, gently and felt his response, it
was to be the sweetest and most poignant kiss shell ever have.
after kissing for what seemed like minutes, she leaned slightly
back, looked into his eyes she whispered softly against his lips,
i love you too, i need you too and i want you too, youve no idea
how very much and i want you to know that and always remember it.
she could see the relief in his eyes and continued huskily and
when you burn with aching desire for me in the stillness of the
night and seek release, i pray youll never, ever, ever find it.
you were not free to love me, why do you make me love you so? she
narrowed the gap between them again and gave him the most
passionate kiss ever, putting all her love and passion into it,
caught by surprise, he too gave in to the pleasure, oblivious to
the gasps and stares of other fellow coffee drinkers. finally, she
gave his lower lip a sharp nip but it didnt draw blood before
breaking the kiss. she stood up, picked up her handbag and walked
away without a backward glance, her broken heart crying as she
exited the cafe.
summer fling, was it a summer fling? how apt. her name is
summerfling too. she recalled their last conversation in Hong Kong
two months ago when she happened to answer a phone call which
shattered her world, they had been lovers by then and so she had
told him, when you choose me to be your love, call me, if you
still intend to marry her, please dont contact me again. ever.
when she found out too late that he was already betrothed to
another.
she has never felt more desolate, lonely and stupid for being
hopeful as she did when she walked out that cafe.
[This message has been edited by summerfling (edited 11 November
2000).]
