I've been in love with this girl since i was 14, we got together
when we were 15. We've been through a lot. 5 years later, we broke
up. 4 days ago, we broke up. I'm really upset and hurt that i dont
know what i should do or what i can do. I really hope a more
experienced person out here can help by giving me advise on what i
should do.
We started like any rs, as a friend who chatted on the phone. Soon,
we were talking about how we like each other. Initially, she would
go on and off, contact me for a month, ignore me for a month and it
continued for around 8 months. Sure, i was hurt during that time,
she just disappear and appear again in my life. Still, i never did
stop loving her. 8 months later, she told me it was due to her
being afraid that she would fall too much for me. That was how, we
finnally got official.
We dated, went out. I was happy, we were happy. It was my first and
her first relationship. I loved her. It was long before soon, i was
bombarded with lies. Lots and lots of lies. Still, i never gave up.
I held on to her simply because i love her. Irregardless of how
much lies she gave, how much time she promise not to lie to me
anymore, it continues, still, i continue to have faith it her. It
was until 6 months later, we had a very heaty quarrel. She told me,
shes starting to fall for another guy. I was hurt. For the first
time in my life, i cried for a girl. I cried in front of my mum
like a baby because i was so hurt. I told her, that i would respect
her choice if that was what she really wanted. 2 days later, she
came back into my life, saying that she has chosen me instead of
her. I accepted her back into my life, simply because i love her
too much. Too much for my own good i guess. Lies didn't stop. She
continue lying and meeting the guy in secret. It was until 1 year
later i finally decided. It's the end. We broke up.
It wasn't the end of our relationship. 2 years later, we patched
back. During this 2 years, I've never stopped loving her nor hav i
ever stop missing and thinking about her. This time, my love for
her was even more intense. I thought, we were really fated and
meant to be, thats why we got back together after 2 years of
breaking up. I gave in 100% to this relationship, to try and make
it last. to make our childhood lovestory last.
After the pached up, i did everything i could to make her feel
loved and care.
I find her every single day, not just during the "honeymoon period"
just because i dont want to make her feel lonely.
No matter how tired i am, even when i work til 3 ~ 4am, i would
still go over her place, wake up at 6am the next morning just to on
heater and cook breakfast for her.
I would bring her out often, pay for everything simply because i
wanted her to have more money to spend on herself.
I stopped clubbing even when im entitled to free entry and drinks
because she dont like me hanging out at such places.
I drove all the way from 1 end of singapore to another just to
fetch her home becuase she says she's tired and dont wish to take
the MRT for a hour.
i waited for her all night til 4am just because i dont want her to
go back home alone after chilling at her friend places, even when i
need to wake up early the next morning.
I would do everything to make her parents like me, from helping out
at a party, to driving her parents around when they needed to buy
stuff, to doing every single thing and paying to every single
detail.
i would buy anything she wanted and liked. Not that its anything
extremely expensive. but i still saved really long for those.
I bought her oversea, around to play, to have fun, to make her feel
loved.
All these are just some of it. Ive done so much for her. Ive done
everything i could because there was only a focus. She was my
focus. i did everything to make us last, til marriage, til we have
our kids, til we both grow old, til we both die.
After we patched back, it wasn't the end to her lies. Yap she was
good. a really good girlfriend. I'm not saying she's not and im not
pushing all the blame to her. I enjoyed how she would offer to
massage me. how she would let me sleep on her lap and pat me to
sleep when im not feeling well. buy food for me when im
hungry.
but there was stuff that i didnt like about her.
I dont like the fact that no matter what i did for what, all that
she ever blogged about me was when i blamed her for lying to me,
when i lost my cool because i was so angry that she lied to me. It
was because of this, none of her friends liked me, but i didnt
mind. I continued to do what i can for her, simply because i love
her. I dont like the fact that whenever we quarreled, she would
find guys to talk to and so on, so much so that whenever after a
quarrel, i would see messages of her with other guy flirting and
saying stuff like "when u giving me the hug u own me?"
It was until 4 days ago, our relationship came to the very end. It
was so painful. I was so hurtful. I dont know what i should do now
because i feel so hurt and lost nothing seems to be able to cheer
me up. I still love her. I still miss her. I still needed her love
but it was something that i can never get it anymore. She fell for
another guy once again. This time, she chose to left with that guy.
She chose to end our love that has been going on for 6 years, with
a guy she barely knew. When i went to beg her to come back to me.
All i got from her was this cruel sentence " i go and discuss with
my bf if i should return to you". I had became nothing but a joke
between her and her new bf.
Im hurt. Terribly hurt. I need help and im serious about it. I just
hope someone might have some answer for me.
P.S. sorry if i posted this on the wrong section. i dont know what
else i could do beside asking for help everywhere. Thanks.
