Zodiac: Analysing Ispyyy (long read)

last SG · 2007-11-01T12:39:26+00:00

As much as I enjoyed play acting astrologer / gypsy... Here goes the link: http://songsdomain.tripod.com/zodiac/index.html I'm glad you guys pored over the...

soleachip SG

Gen X bro if she's Virgo what's your sign ar?

The Virgo Woman

If you're looking for the perfect housekeeper and have just read somewhere that Virgo women are masters (or mistresses) of the art, you should probably bestow your insult on some other sign. The main gift of the Virgo woman is her intelligence, not her orderliness; and when you find the compulsive housebound type who dusts three times a day then you're courting trouble because you've got yourself a Virgo who's fallen into the shadow side of the sign. And all that good housekeeping will pale into insignificance beside the shrewishness which goes with it. This isn't, we repeat, what Virgo is about.

As a by-product it can be a nice bonus, and there are plenty of Virgo women who take an interest in their homes and like an orderly environment. But Virgo as it expresses itself through the feminine psyche seems to be about things like good taste, and subtlety, and understanding, and a keen wit about people and life.

There are catches, of course. The self-contained figure of myth is very much in evidence in the Virgo woman, and it's often difficult for Virgo to really be 'married' in any deep sense of the word. There's a quality about the Virgo woman which is psychologically untouchable, and if you try to invade it you get the same reaction as if you tried physical rape. Virgo women aren't usually the clinging, helpless type. More often they're amazons who show a frightening degree of capability and efficiency, either on a physical level or a mental one - or even sometimes both. Good points for Women's Lib, but bad points if you want to be the sun around which a happily reflecting moon orbits.

For one thing, Virgo women have opinions. Mercury's connection with the sign seems to come out in a need to communicate, to talk, sometimes to simply gossip and chat. Many Virgo women talk endlessly. Sometimes it can make you cover your ears and begin screaming, just to make the sound stop. It may not be the traditional Virgo criticism, either. It may be all about the latest book she read, or the film she saw, or the person she's lately been taking apart and analyzing psychologically. Virgos love to talk about other people, in great detail. So if you're after the beautiful, silent type, forget it.

Virgo women also have a sometimes admirable, sometimes infuriating propensity to question your word and your knowledge, too. Tell her something and she'll ask the source, complete with footnotes. Virgo tends to believe not to believe anybody else until the definitive reference work becomes available. It's hard to be more knowledgeable than a Virgo, because they won't allow it. It's got a good and bad side. It does wonders for your intellectual scope, and horrors for your ego.

Many Virgo women come close to the figure of the Earth Mother, because the peculiar sensitivity of the sign expresses itself through a love of nature and a healing and skillful touch with all crafts. It seems to be a typical Virgo skill to have a 'knack' with handicrafts of all kinds. The arts for their own sake rarely attract Virgo, because things must be useful to be relevant. But the Virgo woman displays immense skill at gardening, and craftsmanship in many areas. And the quality of needing to be needed which attracts so many Virgos into the helping professions, from nursing to dieticians to psychologists and counselors, is very much an aspect of the Great Mother archetype which is connected with the sign.

The thing is, you often have to find it behind the high-strung nervous system, the edginess, the need for solitude, the apparent coolness and detachment. It's hard for a Virgo woman to be spontaneous. Often she can only show love and affection by doing physical things for you. The situation applies here as to the Virgo male: emotion and passion are disturbing and frightening, and can only be expressed in an atmosphere of complete trust. Break that trust and you'll get the sarcastic, cutting edge of the Virgo tongue, which can be really vicious because she's been observing with minute care all the weaknesses and foibles which you didn't think anybody noticed. Virgo women have a disconcerting habit of noticing the carefully hidden frayed cuff, the razor nick, the scuffed shoe, the word-slip, the nervous twitch you thought you were controlling. They observe minute things because for Virgo the vast spectrum of life is best reflected in the small. For the Virgo woman, the great art is the art of the small.

It may be appropriate to remind you again of those Virgos who are anything but tight-lipped spinstership shrews: the Greta Garbos and Sophia Lorens and Jacqueline Bissetts of the world. But you can see a thread which runs through these women as well as every other Virgo woman, from Lauren Bacall (another Virgo) to Twiggy. Notice the attention given to skill. Whatever Virgo does, it does well, and Virgo women are no exception. These are skilled actresses, with polish and impeccable performance. Whether cooking or sculpting or teaching or whatever, Virgo women take pride in their skill. Appreciate it and you'll earn her warmth. Ignore it or undervalue it, and you've made a ghastly mistake. And if you're one of those men who doesn't think it's appropriate for a woman to be skilled in anything except pleasing a man, you're courting real trouble with a Virgo woman.

Curiously, Virgo needs lots of respect - a need which isn't always evident in the other signs, which are less likely to identify with their skills. Also notice the quality of cool self-containment about these women. Married or not, they all radiate some mysterious aloofness which is not so much a 'keep out' sign as a 'welcome, but respect my separateness'. It's evident even in the heat of sexual passion or intense emotion with Virgo. Self-contained. If you can learn to deal with the shadowy side, the know-it-all quality, the occasional fits of ordering and tidying either the environment or you, then you can reach the other side of Virgo. Isn't it nice to be able to appreciate someone who is capable of being her own person? While all women, and all people, ultimately strive for this, Virgo makes a career and sometimes an art of it.

Virgo won't adore you blindly. She'll more likely love you for your flaws and imperfections, because she's a realist and also it makes her feel needed. And it can either terrify a man into running eighty miles an hour in the opposite direction, or it can be a wonderful cooling bath to actually be able to be yourself. But then, it depends on the sort of man you are, doesn't it?

GenX SG

[quote]Originally posted by soleachip:
[b]

Gen X bro if she's Virgo what's your sign ar?

me virgo also

Agenda SG

im a LEO MAN..

Can say that the horocsope thing applies to me in some part. I am very idealistic and always want things to be fairy-tale like

Laughing

soleachip SG

The Virgo & Virgo Relationship

When you wake up in the mornings, the naughtiness and evil passions with which you went to bed have been folded up small and placed at the bottom of your mind; and on the top, beautifully aired, are spread out your prettier thoughts, ready for you to put on.

That's the way all Virgos really prefer to wake in the morning - greeting the virginal dawn's promise of a day of peace, loveliness, and perfection. Too bad most of them don't.

The majority of them climb grumpily out on the wrong side of the bed and slump into the kitchen, groping for their prune juice (Nature's remedies, you see, are always best for aiding regularity. There's always the danger that laxatives might be habit forming, which could lead to serious dependency.)

Unfortunately, the negative thoughts and nagging worries two Virgos carefully fold and place at the bottom of their minds with pure intent the night before, have a way of popping right back up to say 'Boo!' to them next morning, getting tangled with their prettier, positive thoughts for each other... perhaps because they weren't folded quite small enough, or perhaps because both Virgos are reluctant to close the drawer on trouble, preferring to leave it open just a crack, so they can peek periodically and count the exact number of their current crop of problems. Virgos treat these problems like they treat their houseplants - with constant, dutiful attention, never forgetting to water them, the latter with distilled H2O, the former with distilled tears. Naturally, given such tender, loving care, both will sprout quickly, grow profusely, and need frequent pruning.

Now, we'll get right along with the analysis of the VIRRGO-VERGO relationship. But first let me say to any Virgos reading this chapter - and to any Sun Sign people with the Moon or Ascendant in VIRAGO, that if my prayer is, perchance, not completely answered, one hundred percent, it could be some sort of subtle message from the Universe that God isn't as interested in how we spell His name, as in the love and tolerance and forgiveness we show toward one another's goofs and mistakes. You know what I mean?

It's a good and necessary thing for language to be spoken, written, and printed in the most correct form, whenever possible, to avoid misunderstandings in human communication, which is difficult enough at best. Nevertheless, the kindness to overlook the unintentional mistakes of others is also a good and necessary thing. It is, in fact, as St. Exupéry's Little Prince would say, 'a matter of great consequence.'

Two Virgos who are associated as friends, business associates, relatives, or lovers are often compelled to measure one another's every emotion, action, and response - to spell out every opinion and reaction, using the unabridged dictionary of their own or society's preconceived standards of perfection. And that's a terrible waste of time, which could be better spent flying kites, making snowmen installing waterless toilets to save our streams and rivers and oceans from final extinction and pollution rescuing kitties and puppies and baby monkeys from Washington's HEW-funded vivisectionists, who torture them so cruelly running with the wind in your hair wading in a rippling brook or weaving dreams, which are the true realities.

Someone needs to point out gently to Virgos (and a fair scattering of Librans too) that logic isn't the god it appears to be, for logic implies a dangerous fallacy: the assumption that what never has been can therefore never be - and the converse assumption - that what has always been therefore must always be.

The word 'therefore' is the tool of logic that can be put even the most alert player behind in a cosmic anagram game of enlightenment. Not always, but frequently, the word 'therefore' is a warning signal to an open mind that someone is about to snap it shut, lock it, and throw away the key - more in error than such blanket assumptions of half-blind logic, born of the fallacies of preconditioned thinking. Such unquestioning acceptance makes us all vulnerable to the madmen whose goal it is to control the individual human mind (and eventually the masses) through various forms of drugs and hypnosis - and subliminal messages flashed on television, too swift for the human eye to see, but not too swift to seed into the subconscious.

soleachip SG

continuing Virgo & Virgo relationship...

Although the Virgo essence will help us all keep a watchful eye out for such dangers, the same Virgo virtue can be used via the negative side of the coin. Virgos undeniably possess excellent qualifications for both scientific and metaphysical research, but they're sometimes inclined to trip and fall into the trap of the occasional misuse of the word 'therefore,' thereby losing their chance to experience the soaring freedom of discovering their own awesome creative consciousness - the deeper Truth, unrelated to logic (in its present, misleading state of interpretation) that they can be, if they choose, co-creators with Good. (NOTE TO PRINTER: Actually, I meant that last word to be God, instead of Good, but please typeset it as it is, since the meaning is identical. Thank you kindly.) Sometimes, a mistake can be very helpful. If only Virgos realized that.

There are, of course, Virgos who've become free souls, entering into a variety of fields with bright-eyed perception. They're learned to close the drawer on their insignificant worries, ignore their temporary troubles, and keep their sights on the dawn of the New Age. By combining their splendid talents for discrimination within the wider, wind-swept spaces of two open minds, these Virgos can tune-in together to the ever-more-insistent, thunderous call of their ruling planet, Vulcan, which will soon be located and identified, orbiting near the Sun and Mercury. In fact, Vulcan's discovery is so near 'in Time,' there's already been a partial release of its powerful magnetic influences throughout the cosmos. These invisible, but potent, vibrations are increasingly affecting Earthlings - but are especially stirring strange and sometimes disturbing reactions in Virgos themselves. Many of them will need to learn how to handle the new energy, but some, as just mentioned, have already adjusted to the higher frequency, and are utilizing it, even now, with amazing results, in their personal and emotional lives, as well as in their careers.

As long as we're playing anagrams, the word 'vulcanize' derives its meaning from the planet Vulcan, as a process which subjects rubber (and people) to sulphurous treatment and extreme heat, resulting in both greater strength - and more elasticity. And so, you see, it's due to the mysterious influence of their own true ruling planet that two Virgins in every kind of association or relationship together are experiencing this temporarily upsetting, but eventually rejuvenative, vulcanizing process within themselves. Gradually, they'll find it will reveal to them that they possess a formerly unsuspected strength (of purpose), along with more elasticity (of viewpoint), which will be visibly reflected in less uptight behaviour, and fewer self-critical urges.

It's an interesting fact that some aspects of the planet Vulcan's new vibrations also will soon be (and already are) causing, not Virgos alone, but certain people of all twelve Sun Signs to experience a subtle cell regeneration, which will eventually lead to making chronological age impossible to detect - the degree of their experience depending on the still-unknown (because as yet not astronomically calculated) position of Vulcan in their birth horoscopes. This is a process similar to the alchemical techniques miracled by the Alchemist Adept known to metaphysicians as the Count de St. Germain (only one of his multiple identities), who, according to eighteenth-century historians, rejuvenated particular lades of the French court, some of whom, at a chronological age of over eighty, were sufficiently young and beautiful in appearance to have men in their late teens and twenties fighting duels for their favours.

Whether St. Germain's alchemy-magic or Vulcan's new vibrations, there are many roads to Rome, many wonders about to burst upon us in this dawning Aquarian Age - assuming we quickly decide not to annihilate ourselves through nuclear and ecological insanity. 'New' planets (which are not new at all, but have been discovered, identified, and rediscovered after each major Earth cataclysm) are always 'discovered' right on schedule, synchronized to the timetable of a long-ago chosen Free Will evolvement of mankind and womankind into the spiritual maturity to accept these powerful preordained influences. Before such 'discovery' at such destined time, their vibrations are muted, partially and temporarily controlled.

When two Virgos get together, however little or much one or either of them might be influenced by Vulcan's new vibes, they worry a lot. Yet, most of their worries are 'much ado about nothing.' (Thank you, Will Shakespeare, for the line. The Bard, by the way, was another of the multiple identities of the Count of St. Germain). If they think about it, they'll realize they spend too much precious time in nonproductive and counterproductive worrying.

The alarm didn't go off, causing one of them to be late for an appointment or (heaven forbid!) for work. Whose fault was the resulting inexcusable tardiness, and unforgivable lack of punctuality? It has to be someone's fault, doesn't it? No, it does not. It can just as easily be no one's fault.

An expensive china lamp gets broken, an important letter wasn't mailed, a chequeing account is overdrawn, the car fender gets scraped, the front-door key is lost, the zinnias didn't get potted - but one of the Virgos did! - the dentist's bill wasn't paid, the cat's tail is caught in the garbage disposal, the philodendron is drooping - who forgot to water it? Who broke the lamp, lost the key, scrambled the bank book, totaled the car, burned the toast, and - oh, WHO CARES!? Virgo does, believe me.

Reluctant to blame the other one completely (at least inwardly), each Virgo often stands self-accused, self-subjected to a harsh verdict of GUILTY AS CHARGED. Then comes the stiff, self-imposed sentence - emotional blockage, consisting of suppressed resentment, tense anxiety, plus the hair shirt of excessive atonement, and self-chastisement - with time off for good behaviour in the future, which Virgos can't seem to comprehend is humanly impossible at all times. To continue to strive for it is fine, but to consistently demand it from oneself and from others is futile as well as emotionally exhausting and energy depleting.

The most difficult problem two Virgos face, always magnified in their 1-1 Sun Sign Pattern association, may be summed up in one word: elimination. Not only is this a scatological symptom, creating discomforts ranging from simple constipation to serious intestinal complaints, it can also manifest as the equally uncomfortable emotional blockage mentioned in the previous paragraph. The simple remedy in the latter instance is an honest realization of the need to eliminate - o purge the mind and heart of foolish feelings of inadequacy, guilt, and frustration over a temporary inability to change a situation which is less than perfectly desirable, as swiftly and methodically as impatient Mercury demands. (But there's hope! Mercury won't long influence the Virgins, for Vulcan will soon be demanding Mercury's abdication, and sending him back to play mind games with Gemini, where he belongs.)

soleachip SG

continuing Virgo & Virgo relationship...

As with all 1-1 Sun Sign vibrational pairs, Virgo and Virgo have much in common - sometimes too much - but empathizing as they do with one another's mutual viewpoints and hang-ups, there's no reason why they can't try to enjoy, rather than destroy, each other. It will help if their Moon Signs and/or Ascendants are compatible. It will also help if they both relax and take the disappointment of life's little snarls and tangles more casually, with a grain of salt and a pinch of humour - not judging themselves or others as compulsively, leaving the more complex analyzing to precisely programmed robots and computers, which are not as susceptible to the tummy aches of tension.

Virgos might well profit from the example of the saints, since they have such a thing about perfection, and the saints, have managed to come about as near to that ideal state as is humanly possible in a flesh body. I mean, like - nothing ever really rattles a saint.

I'm on a very close terms with both St. Anthony and St. Francis of Assisi (especially Francesco), through whom I learned, firsthand, of the reaction of St. Christopher (by tradition the protector of travelers) when he first heard the news about the Vatican (Printer: lowercase v, please) withdrawing his former canonization as a saint. Although his angelic demotion and dishonourable discharge considerably shook up millions of his loyal friends down here on Earth, creating lots of fussing and fretting, and heated religious controversy, 'Chris' had a large chuckle over the entire affair. He wasn't the least bit broken up over losing his formal saint status, for the simple reason that he never knew they'd made him one in the first place.

To him, it was all a tempest in a teacup. He just goes right on about his business of miracles and unselfish service to others, with or without the vatican's canonized stamp of approval. Tony and Francesco (of Assisi) tell me that Christopher's sense of humour is still intact, that he's as completely nonjudgmental as ever, totally unaware of his own humility, and not worried in the slightest about whether the first letter of his boss's various pronouns should be a capital or a lowercase letter - as in 'thy will be done' as opposed to 'Thy will be done.'

I hereby move that all Virgos adopt St. Christopher as their official guru. Is there a Virgo out there who will second the motion? There is? God! Then the subject is closed. I mean - Good. Then the subject is closed. We can vote later.

Scania N113CRB luver SG

True true. I always suspect people is ignoring me or have a sense of hate towards me. Laughing

Intense . Hmm .. I show rather great hates or loves towards a particular subject . Say for example , i abhor balloons so much that i seldom touch it . MRT as well , whenever my families takes the MRT , i die die will say no to MRT and take bus .

To me is , once i say no and decided against that particular thing , its always a no . No Yes or whatsoever. Twisted Evil Laughing

Isis SG

Date of birth and time.

[url]http://www.astro.com[url]

This is an interactive horoscope website..

tinuviel07 SG

thanks chip!

you really do look like a jc student.. hahaha

nanren4ever SG

What about the Zodiac cancer? u only talk about the women part for Cancerians.

And why u think Cancerians are the worst type to hang out with?

soleachip SG

Very sweet of you to say that tiny, am always delighted when they ask for an ID when I get smokes and drinks in town. It could be the night light though when we met, some colleagues think I'm closing in on mid 30s.

Use Neutrogena facial masks and drink lots of whiskey, they work well together.

soleachip SG

Most Cancerians (males) I know of make very intimate writers because they're full of pathos, overwhelming emotions and they have the patience to convey them into words. (Females I think they are fine because biologically they are supposed to be full of womanese. Tiny is one and she seems rather fine.)

Good to hang out with because they are great listeners (not hearing, but actually listening and they remember) but the moment you hit a raw nerve, it usually takes them days or weeks to forget the 'hurt'. When they get like that they are worse than whining women. They become unbearable (especially because males are supposed to be conditioned strong and un-affected).

Just my 2 cents worth, hope you don't feel offended (and I'm not in trouble) by my remarks if you happen to be a Cancerian. Cheers.

Cancer
circumambulates for a while,
and when it grabs the prize with its pincers,
you have to virtually kill it to get it to let go.

'Don't throw out that old plastic bottle,' said a Cancer friend to me once. 'It might come in useful sometime.' This piece of advice is a paradigm (a miniature replica of a much larger reality) of Cancer. Whether it's an old plastic bottle, an old lover, an old house, an old belief, an old bit of string, an old memoryHang on to it, says Cancer. You never know when you might need it again. Not that Cancer is a particularly 'practical' sign in the way we have met practicality in the element of earth. Cancer is much too imaginative, too immersed in a world of dreams and longings and subtle currents of emotion, to treat everything in the literal terms of how much it's worth.

But one of the strongest urges in this watery sign is the urge for security. For what's known and familiar, comforting and safe. It is an emotional motivation, not a practical one. I once knew a Cancer man who kept an old shoebox locked in a desk drawer. In it was the most bizarre assortment of objects gathered together that I have ever seen: old chewing-gum wrappers (thankfully the gum was missing), pieces of rope, old photographs, bits of lace, nuts and screws and used bent nails, fragments of magazine articles, a dried flower of unknown origin, and most difficult to believe, an old (and used) French letter. At this point, being familiar with astrology, I didn't even bother to ask why. I knew the answer.

Now this rather extreme example of Cancer's penchant for saving things is a little pathological. But you can be sure that every Cancer has a metaphorical shoebox somewhere, where things from the past linger. Beneath the Crab's peculiar and often disconcerting penchant for not letting go - of anything - lies one of the most sensitive and vulnerable of all the zodiacal signs. Cancer is ruled by the moon, and the moon's phases, constantly shifting and changing, are an apt image of the constant ebb and flow of moods, desires, feelings, fears and intuitions that wash through this apparently solid and conservative temperament. Yes, conservative. Think about what the word means. Cancer knows all about conservation. Waste not, want not.

With all the canniness of a Scot (Scotland, in fact, is said to be ruled by Cancer), the Cancerian will carefully nurture and protect those tender feelings beneath a bristling fortified wall of souvenirs, mementoes, stock certificates, insurance policies, old photographs, family support, tradition, and a strong tendency toward preserving the status quo. That is, as long as the status quo protects 'me and mine.'

Cancer is traditionally the sign of the family. This doesn't necessarily mean that every Cancer wants, or should have, a family in the conventional sense. Lots of Cancers, contrary to popular conception, are not domestic. They needn't have ties of blood. But the feeling of continuity with the past is terribly important to Cancer. The past is often more real to Cancer than the present, because it's known and therefore safe. Cancer's roots sink deep into the earth. Where there is a past, there could be a secure future. With his roots firm in the ground, Cancer can indulge in his love of exploration, his wandering instinct, his changeability. A Cancer who is cut off from his roots is a very sorry creature - until he learns to grow new roots, either a new family or a group of friends or a work project. Something. Without these things, the Crab withdraws ever more tightly into his shell until he is imprisoned by his own fear of the future and his terror of the unknown.

The Crab is an instructive animal to watch if you want to learn about Cancer. Firstly, it never moves directly towards something it wants. It always circumambulates, to make it look as though it is actually heading off into a completely different direction. 'What me? Interested in that? Don't be silly. It's the last thing on my mind.' But when it grabs for the prize, and those pincers close, you have to virtually kill it to get it to let go. It won't fight; crabs are non-aggressive animals. It will take pummeling, pushing, shoving, any treatment you care to give it. It simply hangs on, until you get tired and go away.

Watch a Cancer woman at a party, when she spots a man she is attracted to. Move straight in and begin a conversation? Never. She will circle around the room, studiously ignoring the desired object. She will chat brightly to everyone within range. She will somehow contrive to join a group standing nearby. She might succeed in spilling her drink an inch from his trouser leg, and probably not even be aware of what she is doing, in any calculating way. Cancer is an instinctive sign, doesn't like to analyse its own motives. But take the initiative directly? Never. That exposes her to possible rejection, humiliation or looking ridiculous. If you really want to see a Cancer terrified, threaten him with those things: rejection, humiliation, loss of face. Cancer is so sensitive, so vulnerable to other people's opinions of himself. That is, unless he absolutely trusts everyone present. Then anything might happen.

soleachip SG

It's been said that Cancers are manipulative. This is absolutely true. But let's explore this trait of manipulativeness. It has some rather complex sources. Cancer is a water sign. His great gift is his capacity to subtly work with feeling - his own and those of others. He doesn't plan this out, as a strategy, the way an air sign would. He operates with a marvelous instinctual grace that adapts itself to the immediate situation. Rather than go after a goal aggressively and in the open - remember the fear of rejection and humiliation - he would rather work on the atmosphere and the feelings of other people, to orientate them toward his own objectives.

Whatever one may think of President Jimmy Carter's political or religious sympathies, one must concede that he is a good conciliator. He is a Cancer. This facility for working to smooth quarrels and bring people together is a wonderful gift when dealing with children. Cancer will never bully a child or use unjustified 'heavy authority'. The 'do it because I say so' approach isn't one of Cancer's tools, as it is of Scorpio and Aries and Leo. Cancer gently guides, so that half the time you think the idea came from you. Subtlety is one of the chief qualities of Cancer.

This like every other gift in human nature, is double-edged. The nastier edge appears when the Cancer applies the gentle pressure of emotional blackmail to get you to do things his way. Most people in our culture are terribly vulnerable to guilt. It's ingrained in our Judeo-Christian heritage. Being selfish is a sin, almost as bad as Original Sin. And Cancer is a past master at the art of stimulating a sense of guilt. An insecure Cancer, anxious to hang on to the person or situation which gives him his safety, will often use this deadly implement to get his way. We might call this role the Martyr. It goes something like this:

ADOLESCENT TO CANCER MOTHER: Well Mum, I've finally decided what I'm going to do next year. I'm going to travel abroad, go to Paris, and study languages at the Sorbonne.

CANCER MOTHER: (after some silence, during which she digests (a) that her child is 'leaving her', (b) what she can do to stop him.)
Paris? Yes, I suppose Paris is a lovely place. I've never been to Paris myself. I never had the time, or the money. (A sad, martyred look crosses her face. The suffering of the world is upon her.) That will be wonderful for you. I wish I could have gone to Paris when I was your age. But I had to bring up all you children, and work a job at the same time. And your father never made much money, and wouldn't take me anywhere. I worked my fingers to the bone, supporting you children and taking care of the house. Then there was the war, and all that. I would have loved to go to Paris.

CHILD: (beginning to feel vaguely guilty about being happy and having a future, although unsure just why) Well, when I'm settled over there, I'll have you come for a visit.

CANCER MOTHER: Visit Paris? Oh no, I couldn't. I have nothing to wear, and I'm so tired these days, keeping the house in order and washing and ironing the clothes. Of course, if you waited another year, Julie would be old enough to get a job. But of course you must go next year. Still, it would have been nice. But I'll stay here and take care of your father. (Long sigh, recognizable as the Cancer Sigh.) It'll be terribly lonely here. But I suppose life is all about sacrifice, isn't it? If you really love, then you have to sacrifice.

CHILD: (feeling even guiltier) Don't you want me to go?

CANCER MOTHER: (in great protest) Of course I do! How can you ask me that? I think it's wonderful that you young people can have that freedom and the money to do what you like. It isn't like when I was young and your parents came first. I suppose people are just more selfish these days. I was just thinking of those lonely evenings at home, you know the phone always rings for you these days, all my friends have moved out of town, and I never have time to see them, being so busy with the cleaning and shopping.

Needless to say, the end of this scenario is not a trip to Paris. Not next year, or even the year after that. If foiled yet again, this kind of Cancer will not hesitate to develop a bad heart, migraine headaches, or the old-time-honoured phrase, 'Do you want to kill me?' Once upon a time this was also known as the Jewish Mother Syndrome.

Now perceptive people will have noticed that you don't have to be either Jewish or a mother to play this game. Husbands play it, children play it, wives play it, boyfriends and girlfriends play it, even employers play it. When Cancers are threatened with isolation of the loss of loved ones - through independence, distance, or any other means - they will often resort to the martyr. Not a pretty device.

The thing is, Cancer does not need to be needed. And to love and nurture and cherish. And to apply the role of Mother, in some shape or form. (This means Cancer men as well.) The important thing is to find the Child on levels other than the purely biological one. Once the children have grown, Cancer needs other outlets, preferably creative ones. The sensitivity, the gentleness, the delicate touch of this deep and subtle sign can be as usefully and productively placed on a project, a business, a home, a work of art, a piece of poetry, an animal, a garden. If it is all poured wholly into the beloved person, it is pretty natural for that person to either rebel or to turn inward in seething resentment, without fully understanding why. Cancer pays a tragic price for his emotional blackmail: the enmity of a loved one, in the end.

We should observe two more things about the crab, to complete our initial portrait of Cancer. The crab develops in a cyclical way. This is true too of Cancer people. I once had a pair of hermit crabs as pets. These creatures are practically fascinating because, rather than having hard shells of their own, they wear the shells of dead mollusks, and camouflage them. There is a kind of Cancer whose shell is culled from others, as well as a kind who grows his own. Now when a hermit crab outgrows his shell - which he inevitably does - he must find a bigger one, and make the move in total safety. Underneath the shell, the crab is a defenceless, completely vulnerable creature.

There is a period of time when crabs must hide in the sand while the new shell grows hard. They have to remain hidden, or they will be instant dinner for the nearest seagull without so much as a by-your-leave. Cancer people too have these cycles, where they must withdraw after a change and a period of new growth. Surprise them or intrude upon them when they are going through their quiet private time, and you can damage them irrevocably. Damage them in childhood, and they will retreat into a too-small shell, sometimes never to emerge. It takes a long time for the Crab to forget, once he has been wounded.

soleachip SG

Finally - and perhaps most importantly, since it leads into our discussion of Cancer myth - is the Crab's natural environment. He is neither a creature of water, nor of land; he inhabits the border between the two. Let's translate this into human terms. On one side is the dry land of the real world - bills, real estate, responsibilities, commitments, facts. That's one of Cancer's needs.

The other is the fathomless depths of the ocean of his imagination. Cancer belongs to both worlds. He must have time to give to each - time to nurture his secret dreams and longings in the shifting waters of his deep inner nature, and time to build a place of shelter and security in the world. A complex sign, Cancer. And a complex personality.

It is almost impossible to get a Cancer to analyse himself, or to trot out his deepest secrets. Popular astrology usually considers Scorpio to be the most secretive of the signs. But Scorpio is secretive on purpose. He knows his safety lies in smokescreens. Cancer is secretive by second nature. He is full of half-germinated seeds that need the darkness and the safety of quiet and privacy. His retreat is natural, not thought out. It must be respected. The creative fruit he brings forth is worth waiting for.

soleachip SG

The Cancer Lover

In a true Cancerian, love has a lot to do with security. It also has a lot to do with affection and kindness and sympathy. And it has a lot to do with Mother.

Cancer is as capable of intense passion as Scorpio. But because it is a more vulnerable sign, Cancer tends to be more discriminating about where that passion is expressed. And very slow to commit it, because trust is terribly important for all the water signs.

Initially, people in love tend to behave in similar ways. But if Cancer becomes truly involved, the myth of the mother is likely to begin to enter. This may mean needing to be mothered - and this can apply to women as well as men. Many Cancer women look for rather maternal men - men who will be kind and gentle with them. Equally often, it means Cancer wants to do the mothering. Show your pain, your helplessness, your weakness, your need, and you have won Cancer where your strengths might interest him much less. Remember that Cancer needs to be needed. And don't expect everything to be spoken.

It's a rare Cancer who wears his or her heart in full view on the sleeve. You have to learn to read signals, if you're involved with Cancer. And become a gifted interpreter of moods. Sullen sulkiness means he feels rejected. Clinginess means he needs reassurance. Whining means he's feeling sorry for himself today. Crabbiness means he's feeling unappreciated. And so on. But try to confront the issue, and the Crab will slide away from you. Usually he doesn't understand himself what's going on. It's just a stray mood.

Cancer tends to be loyal in relationships. This is because security is important. But is a changeable sign; and that loyalty may take a lot of buffering on the surface. Cancer is notorious for keeping the home base and collecting thrills on the journey. On the other hand, if he is sufficiently secure, he will usually be aware of his priorities. Anything that jeopardizes the security of the relationship isn't on.

Divorce is often a horrific experience for Cancer. Many Cancerians will remain uncommitted because they sense the grueling experience a separation would entail. The disruption of the nest is a true trauma for Cancer, where a Sagittarian might happily pack one bag and go, or a Virgo wrap up the financial affairs tidily before exiting. No separation is easy for Cancer, even if he deeply longs for freedom. Once again, you must learn to read the signs.

Gradual withdrawal emotionally, sexual coolness or impotence, are Cancer's way of saying, 'Get me out of here'. But Cancer will rarely be the one to make the decision to go. First of all, the emotional confrontation is too terrifying. Secondly, other people's opinions are too terrifying. Cancer would much rather become quietly, progressively, more unpleasant until you're the one to throw him out. Then he doesn't have to feel guilty.

It does take a lot, though. It takes trampling on his feelings, being insensitive or cold, shattering his dreams, bullying him, expecting him to be strong when his strength lies in camouflage and tenacity. Betrayal of trust goes deep with the water signs. Rationally they may excuse it. Emotionally, they never do.

The nest is naturally important to Cancer. It is a sign of habit. Even an unsettled Cancer, maintaining a casual affair, will usually collapse in the same chair in the living room, and indulge in the same rituals and drink. Permanent the liaison may not be; but that need for roots and security can give the feeling of continuity to even the briefest, most casual of Cancerian relationships.

It is very easy to love Cancer for his gentleness, his sensitivity, his imagination, his subtlety, his peculiar brand of courage when what he loves is threatened. It is more difficult to endure the moods, and the innate egocentricity of the child which is always present in this complex sign. Whether mother or child, whichever role the Cancer plays - or both - the constant need for affection and reassurance is always present.

If you have one of those emotional natures which is coolly self-sufficient and resents giving affection - particularly when it might not be returned due to a mood - then it's best to stay away from Cancer. If you have a warm heart, and an understanding of what life is like from the inside of this alternatively fragile and tough dreamer, you may be surprised. Cancer's greatest offering in relationships is his profound, instinctual understanding of human nature and human pain. And that isn't often to be found in the marketplace these days.

soleachip SG

The Cancer Man

'Never think,' wrote the poet Rainer Maria Rilke, 'that there is more in life than can be packed into childhood.' We might say, with more accuracy for Cancer, that there is not more in life than can't be packed into Mother. And here you have the greatest strength and also the greatest weakness of the Cancer man in love relationships. This man is tied, one way or another - in love or in hate, and often in both - to Mother.

It may sound simplistic to say that all Cancer men are mother-bound. But it would come close to the truth. Remember what we said about the myths connected with Cancer? And in particular the myth of the Great Mother? Well, there is a test that confronts every Cancer man, and he runs up against it sooner or later in life. Our world being what it is, with so little attention paid to people's inner lives and motivations, most Cancer men take the latter road.

If you think about it, you'll see it's natural. Cancer is a sign of feeling and of deep emotional needs and often dependency. It clings. It doesn't like to stand alone. In childhood, this need for attachment and warmth will naturally focus on the mother. The trouble is once adult, Cancer men are often still looking for that nurturing, protecting woman who will always forgive them, always understand them, care for them, shelter them. You might say, why not? But Cancer, which is a feminine sign, gels oddly with the masculine psyche.

In each man's consciousness, buried deep within him, is the myth of the Hero. How can a hero keep running back to Mummy for comfort and understanding? Psychology postulates that the mother-son tie is one of the most difficult things a man must contend with in life. If he doesn't deal with it - as many Cancer men don't - then his relationships will suffer for it.

There is usually a scenario which follows this theme, and which is pretty common in Cancer marriages. For one thing, Cancer men usually marry young. That is, if they aren't mother-haters. The mother-haters usually marry very late, if at all. They don't know they hate their mothers. They're afraid of women - hence the lack of commitment. But this is a distorted kind of Cancer, a Cancer on the run from his own emotional dependency. You can see a lot of those running about with extra-hard shells on, never really letting you see the vulnerable person underneath. If you probe, they snap at you like good crabs.

The more open Cancer man will, then, usually have a family by the time he's twenty-five. Because of their gentleness, they make excellent fathers, so long as they're not jealous of the mothering their own children receive. But later on, in the thirties or perhaps forties, the pattern that Cancer sets tends to go awry. He will usually be attracted to a strong woman - one of those capable types, often intellectual, who either overtly or subtly must carry the emotional strength for the relationship. His moodiness, changeability, snappishness, fears - all must be understood and coddled. But it is natural for any adolescent boy to kick butt against mother. It's part of the growing-up process.

Eventually Cancer must too, because he's a man. You can imagine what happens then. Who gets kicked? Well, the surrogate mother, of course. If that happens to you, it's not pleasant. Although Cancer is not a divorce-prone sign - after all, marriage is a form of security, isn't it? - Cancer men can be wanderers par excellence. They always come back again. But the question is whether you want them when they do.

This is a sign with a lot of in-built conflict for a man. For one thing, the sensitivity and imagination don't mix well with society's macho expectations of men. Did I hear you say times have changed, women are liberated, etc.? Maybe in London, Amsterdam, New York. But most of the rest of the world lies between. Sophisticated, cosmopolitan cities excluded, it's still a little difficult for a moody, sensitive, introverted, imaginative man to get away with being himself. He must learn camouflage. Cancer's two most common camouflages, as we have seen, are the hard shell and the 'good drinking companion' jolly extrovert face. But these things take their toll on the person inside, unless he's pretty confident himself. How many people you know are that?

For another thing, the mother problem isn't an easy one to solve. Motherhood is both sacred and profane; it is both a biological fact, with little glamour attached, and an archetypal experience. To toe the line between the berating woman - and the maternal side of woman - and overglamorizing it so your mother can do no wrong, is a hard task. To live within the shadow of the Mother, so in touch with the forces of the currents that wash the shores of ordinary life, is a great and harrowing task psychologically for a Cancer man. Most would rather not even think about it. But the deep creativity of this sign cannot really emerge without some understanding of its myth and its task.

The Cancer man is never an easy lover or husband. For one thing, he's too complex, and defies the stereotyped image of the masculine with which our society is imbued. For another, he's evasive and indirect, and the deeper the feeling or the problem, the less likely you are to hear about it. He can be sulky and crabby one moment, effusively sentimental and affectionate the next. But most of all he has feeling, he's alive. Curious about just about everything, he will rarely be rigidly intellectual, but will more likely store what interests him in his extraordinarily attentive memory and draw it out to tell an anecdote or illustrate a point.

Donald Sutherland is a typical Cancerian actor. He is notorious for disliking interviews, for his evasiveness, his versatility, his moodiness. Yet he is extremely masculine, in his own fashion. Not the Burt Reynolds type, maybe. But the loveliest quality in the Cancer man is tenderness and gentleness. They are short-changed these days. Invest your trust, and you draw it out. Who wants Burt Reynolds, anyway?

spadeTwo SG

scorpio 1 very zai
very accurate
and scorpio guys tend to go for pisces and scorpio girls.
scorpio guys, notice that too? Embarassed

dreamykite SG

Originally posted by soleachip:

Heh, my closest female friends one is a scorpio the other one is taurus. Both are reliable and trustworthy.

So you are a capricon? Laughing

xiaoxui SG

Originally posted by soleachip:
[b]The Cancer Man

'Never think,' wrote the poet Rainer Maria Rilke, 'that there is more in life than can be packed into childhood.' We might say, with more accuracy for Cancer, that there is not more in life than can't be packed into Mother. And here you have the greatest strength and also the greatest weakness of the Cancer man in love relationships. This man is tied, one way or another - in love or in hate, and often in both - to Mother.

It may sound simplistic to say that all Cancer men are mother-bound. But it would come close to the truth. Remember what we said about the myths connected with Cancer? And in particular the myth of the Great Mother? Well, there is a test that confronts every Cancer man, and he runs up against it sooner or later in life. Our world being what it is, with so little attention paid to people's inner lives and motivations, most Cancer men take the latter road.

If you think about it, you'll see it's natural. Cancer is a sign of feeling and of deep emotional needs and often dependency. It clings. It doesn't like to stand alone. In childhood, this need for attachment and warmth will naturally focus on the mother. The trouble is once adult, Cancer men are often still looking for that nurturing, protecting woman who will always forgive them, always understand them, care for them, shelter them. You might say, why not? But Cancer, which is a feminine sign, gels oddly with the masculine psyche.

In each man's consciousness, buried deep within him, is the myth of the Hero. How can a hero keep running back to Mummy for comfort and understanding? Psychology postulates that the mother-son tie is one of the most difficult things a man must contend with in life. If he doesn't deal with it - as many Cancer men don't - then his relationships will suffer for it.

There is usually a scenario which follows this theme, and which is pretty common in Cancer marriages. For one thing, Cancer men usually marry young. That is, if they aren't mother-haters. The mother-haters usually marry very late, if at all. They don't know they hate their mothers. They're afraid of women - hence the lack of commitment. But this is a distorted kind of Cancer, a Cancer on the run from his own emotional dependency. You can see a lot of those running about with extra-hard shells on, never really letting you see the vulnerable person underneath. If you probe, they snap at you like good crabs.

The more open Cancer man will, then, usually have a family by the time he's twenty-five. Because of their gentleness, they make excellent fathers, so long as they're not jealous of the mothering their own children receive. But later on, in the thirties or perhaps forties, the pattern that Cancer sets tends to go awry. He will usually be attracted to a strong woman - one of those capable types, often intellectual, who either overtly or subtly must carry the emotional strength for the relationship. His moodiness, changeability, snappishness, fears - all must be understood and coddled. But it is natural for any adolescent boy to kick butt against mother. It's part of the growing-up process.

Eventually Cancer must too, because he's a man. You can imagine what happens then. Who gets kicked? Well, the surrogate mother, of course. If that happens to you, it's not pleasant. Although Cancer is not a divorce-prone sign - after all, marriage is a form of security, isn't it? - Cancer men can be wanderers par excellence. They always come back again. But the question is whether you want them when they do.

This is a sign with a lot of in-built conflict for a man. For one thing, the sensitivity and imagination don't mix well with society's macho expectations of men. Did I hear you say times have changed, women are liberated, etc.? Maybe in London, Amsterdam, New York. But most of the rest of the world lies between. Sophisticated, cosmopolitan cities excluded, it's still a little difficult for a moody, sensitive, introverted, imaginative man to get away with being himself. He must learn camouflage. Cancer's two most common camouflages, as we have seen, are the hard shell and the 'good drinking companion' jolly extrovert face. But these things take their toll on the person inside, unless he's pretty confident himself. How many people you know are that?

For another thing, the mother problem isn't an easy one to solve. Motherhood is both sacred and profane; it is both a biological fact, with little glamour attached, and an archetypal experience. To toe the line between the berating woman - and the maternal side of woman - and overglamorizing it so your mother can do no wrong, is a hard task. To live within the shadow of the Mother, so in touch with the forces of the currents that wash the shores of ordinary life, is a great and harrowing task psychologically for a Cancer man. Most would rather not even think about it. But the deep creativity of this sign cannot really emerge without some understanding of its myth and its task.

The Cancer man is never an easy lover or husband. For one thing, he's too complex, and defies the stereotyped image of the masculine with which our society is imbued. For another, he's evasive and indirect, and the deeper the feeling or the problem, the less likely you are to hear about it. He can be sulky and crabby one moment, effusively sentimental and affectionate the next. But most of all he has feeling, he's alive. Curious about just about everything, he will rarely be rigidly intellectual, but will more likely store what interests him in his extraordinarily attentive memory and draw it out to tell an anecdote or illustrate a point.

Donald Sutherland is a typical Cancerian actor. He is notorious for disliking interviews, for his evasiveness, his versatility, his moodiness. Yet he is extremely masculine, in his own fashion. Not the Burt Reynolds type, maybe. But the loveliest quality in the Cancer man is tenderness and gentleness. They are short-changed these days. Invest your trust, and you draw it out. Who wants Burt Reynolds, anyway?
[/b]

Tom Cruise and Tony Leong also cancerian.

xiaoxui SG

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