Originally posted at the Jokes and Humour forum, this
2 brillant jokes must be shared with as many people as
possible! The mod who edited and locked it have NO sense of humour!
Enjoy!
Officers at
cinema
A group of 3 friends who are Central Narcotics Bureau officers
decided to watch a movie. The movie started, and shortly after the
screen showed a huge drug transaction taking place, involving big
sums of money. The briefcase contained heroin and cocaine, and
after both parties checked the goods, the 3 CNB officers suddenly
stood up and shouted, "Freeze! CNB!" "You're under
arrest!" "Dont move or I'll shoot!" The audience in the
cinema were greatly annonyed and threw their popcorn and snacks at
them, telling them to shut up. One of them took out his handphone,
"This is Ahmad speaking, we have a big big drug transaction over
here.. shit, they have got guns.."
45 minutes later, a group of 16 armed CNB officers arrived at
the cinema, prepared to intercept the drug transaction. When the
officers tried to explain they really saw a drug transaction take
place at the front of the theatre, 2 guys sitting in front of them
exclaimed, "It happened in the movie lah. What idiots." As the 16
armed officers and 3 friends were about to leave the theatre, with
the inspector and senior officers scolding them for wasting their
time and resources, one of the officer shouted agitatedly. "Look!
Selling cocaine to druggies!" All 16 armed officers drew their
pistols and went, "Freeze! CNB!" "You're under arrest!"
"Dont move or I'll shoot!" The characters on screen continued their
business, and when they saw 2 guys walking in with sub-machine gun
slung over their shoulders, cigarette in mouth, and looking fierce,
all the armed officers fired their pistols at the screen madly.
All 19 CNB officers at the movie were locked up in IMH for a
long, long time. Perhaps they will never come out again.
Newton food
centre
A group of 3 senior Narcotics officers from the CNB received
hell notes by parcel. Each received $500,000.
"What should we do with these hell notes?" Remarked one to the
other, during lunchtime at a kopitiam. After some thought the guy
replied, "Easy, spend it at Newton food centre." So they finished
their lunch and went back back to work. The 3 of them sms each
other.
[How much do you think the tiger prawns will cost? Do you think
we can order lobsters?]
[Sure simon, we have 1.5 million, no problem. We can order what
we want.]
[Mark, tonight order what you want, we must finish spend these
hell notes.]
So after work they went to Newton food centre and ordered
lobsters, tiger prawns, bbq stingrays, fried squid, and the stuff.
The bill came at about $2.7 million.
"I thought you say 1.5 million enough?" They then offered to pay
the difference in Sing dollars. The stall assistant took out his
calculator, and shortly after some calculation said, "That would be
1.5 million in hell currency, and $252 in Sing dollars."
The 3 of them emptied their wallets and went home with grim
faces.
The Tottenham
fan
A Tottenham fan, who works as a CNB officer, is moronic.
How did he become a CNB officer if he is moronic?
A) His uncle is high ranking CNB officer
B) He bribe the interviewers with Tottenham jerseys and
merchandise
C) He suck the interviewers cocks
Answer is... All of the above!!
