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What kind of man does this?
He makes wife and sons run 40 laps round HDB
block, then forces wife to kowtow till forehead is bruised.
-TNP
Thu, Sep 30, 2010
The New Paper
What kind
of man does this?
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For more photos, click
here.
By Zaihan Mohamed Yusof
NEIGHBOURS saw the barefoot woman kowtowing to her angry husband
at the foot of the HDB block.
On her knees, she bowed her head, hitting it repeatedly against
the hot floor.
Her two sons flanking her seemed to be giving her
encouragement.
For three hours on Sunday afternoon, the woman and her sons were
forced to run round their Circuit Road block about 40 times,
neighbours told Lianhe Wanbao.
Apparently, they were being punished because one of the boys had
left the flat without asking for permission.
What man would inflict public humiliation on his loved ones,
punishing them in such severe fashion in front of their
neighbours?
Lianhe Wanbao couldn't find out because the man turned nasty on
its team.
When The New Paper team visited the family yesterday hoping to
get some answers,we saw one of the sons outside the flat.
When he was asked if he was the one pictured in the Lianhe
Wanbao report, he merely shrugged at first.
Then he turned aggressive and flung the contents of his soft
drink at us.
He threw the soft drink can from the third-storey corridor to
the ground below before kicking the front gate of his flat to get
his mother to open the door.
When she opened the door, his brother, dressed in an all-white
school uniform, was just as aggressive.
He shouted at us to "get lost" and then grabbed a badminton
racquet and gestured aggressively.
According to the Lianhe Wanbao report, the boys, who looked to
be of primary school age, were seen carrying their school bags as
they ran with their mother.
One neighbour recalled seeing the man standing on the third
floor corridor and shouting at them in Mandarin: "You better run
faster...If you don't, I will punish you more."
None of the residents dared to intervene as it was said that the
man had a reputation for being bad-tempered.
Nevertheless, one of them helped the woman and her tired sons by
giving them a quick drink when the man was not looking.
The neighbour, who also gave them tissues to wipe their
perspiration, told Lianhe Wanbao: "The woman told me, 'Don't ask
(what's happening)...Quick, give it (water) to me...I don't mind
tap water'."
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Man goes too far in
punishing wife and sons
Later, the family could be seen under a covered walkway near the
block.
The father stood in the shade while the mother and her sons
stood in the afternoon sun.
He was heard shouting: "Do you know how to kneel and
kowtow?"
One of the sons gestured to his mother to do what the man had
ordered.
Bruised
Neighbours told Lianhe Wanbao that the woman bowed at least
three times. They reported seeing that her forehead and knees were
bruised.
Yesterday,when we tried to speak to the mother, her forehead was
still black and blue. There seemed to be dried blood on her lower
lip.
One resident told Lianhe Wanbao that even if the boys had done
wrong, they should not have been punished so harshly.
Yesterday, a neighbour, who gave his name only as Mr Samat, told
The New Paper that the boys "were no angels". The ground-floor
resident claimed that they were mischievous.
Mr Samat said: "I think it was one of them (the boys) who had
started a fire last year by throwing a lit paper onto one of the
neighbours' canvas which was drying outside.
He and three other people saw the boy hurling the soft drink can
yesterday.
"We were not surprised when we saw him throw the can when you
tried to approach him.
"These boys are wild. Luckily, nobody was standing below," he
told this reporter.
While Mr Samat was being interviewed, one of the boys flashed a
vulgar sign at us from the third floor.
A neighbour who lives on the fourth floor and did not wish to be
named said she often heard shouting from the flat below.
Said the woman: "I don't speak Mandarin, but from the tone, I
know that an adult man is angry at some children."
Nervous wife
None of the residents interviewed by The New Paper knewhow long
the family has been living there. It is also not known whether the
family is Singaporean.
When tried to ask the boys' mother if she was all right after
Sunday's ordeal, she seemed worried, as though she wanted us to
leave quickly.
Her nervousness became apparent barely five minutes later when
her husband returned home.
By then, The New Paper team was on the ground floor. The man
stared at us from his corridor and muttered something.
The police said yesterday that they received a call for help at
about 3.30pm on Sunday.
A spokesman said all the parties were advised accordingly.
Mr Samat confirmed that he saw the woman and her two sons being
questioned by the police. They were later allowed to return
home.
But their front gate had been locked by the man.
According to Lianhe Wanbao, the three of them huddled outside
the flat to share a packet of rice, which hadbeen left by the
man.
An hour later, at about 6pm, they were seen entering the
flat.
Set limits to punishment before it goes
overboard
TWO lawyers told The New Paper that there were limits to
disciplining children, even naughty ones.
But setting those limits may vary from parent to parent.
Said lawyer S Balamurugan: "I know sometimes a father needs to
discipline his children. But this must be done reasonably.
"Asking boys to run around for a few hours is just too
much."
In cases where a pattern of abuse can be shown and there's
constant ill-treatment by the father, then he could be punished
under the Children and Young Persons Act.
Added Mr Balamurugan: "You don't have to physically abuse the
child or hit him to be guilty of this...as long as it can be proven
there is continued ill-treatment."
Another lawyer, Mr Satwant Singh, offered another view, saying:
"Was the punishment cruel or extreme? After all, he didn't lay a
hand on the boys.
"The question that needs to be answered is, 'Can society condone
such a punishment'?"
Of course, the children must be aware of why they are being
punished, he added.
Mr Singh said the boys' school should be told of the incident
and allowed to intervene.
"The school can develop a better relationship with the
family...There should not be a knee-jerk reaction to get the
authorities involved just because someone is not comfortable with
the manner a parent disciplines a child," he said.
Too harsh a punishment could also have repercussions, warns a
psychologist.
Dr Carol Balhetchet, director of Youth Services at the Singapore
Children's Society (SCS), expressed concerns when told of the
punishment faced by the children.
The aggression the boys showed towards The New Paper team was
just as worrying.
They could follow the wrong example the father sets, she
said.
"Generally, children are victims. Most of them are not born with
this type of aggression," Dr Balhetchet added.
"What they observe from their parents are mimicked. These learnt
behaviours are possibly used by them to solve problems."
She said the boys' aggression could also be due to their wanting
to protect their mother.
This article was first published in The New
Paper.
