Do you know there is such a thing as an unfillial PARENT ? Does
unfillial Parent deserves fillial piety from their children ?
ABSOLUTELY NOT..if the child wants to be fillial anyway.. it's a
gift.. to the unfillial parent.
Fillial piety is a GIFT to the parent .....NOT an
entitlement.
If imdestiny had already tried to explain her situation to her
parents.. and her parents blatantly disregarded her pleas.... are
you suggesting she simply accept her fate and be financially
SLAUTHERED by her parents... simply because she needs to be a
fillial child ? If you agree to let her be slaughtered.. you need
to get your brain examined.
And no.. she does not need to move to another country...
geesh you are so drama.
She just need to keep herself out of reach of her parent's
unyeilding claws..
her character is what led to the current situation. cutting
parents out of her life would be too extreme in her case. likely
hurting her more.
most situations like these tend to arise because the "victim" is
unwilling to take proactive steps to resolve the problem.
somethings are "inborn" or what I felt was drummed into the person
as a child.
and I think you're referring to unloving or uncaring
parents..... unfilial implies they in turn didn't treat their
parents well.
one thing about these situations I've seen /experienced.
particularly from ladies is they tend to "enjoy" playing the role
of victims. given two choices they would choose the more f*** up
one to show they care about their own family. some of which made no
sense at all.
particular incidents stood out in my memory, a young lady
(young at that point) broke up with the boyfriend, because he had
to do ot as an outdoor salesman. reason being they don't see each
other that much and she's doing for his good so he could
concentrate on his career. the guy protested of course, he claims
it's not like they don't love each other or he's unfaithful and
he's actually working towards their future
then I recalled......."I thought you live with each other? don't
you see each other everynight?"
"it's not the same as going out. it's for everyone's good"
and it totally blew my mind to combine the facts with the actual
situation of her crying her heart out so pitifully(I was really
young then, didn't realise for the next decade.... they generally
tend to behave this way)
another one when I got used to this behavior.... there was a
lady who kept pumping money towards her parents' upkeep and
housing(flat wasn't paid for) her (older)brother doesn't
work,hardly works. and her husband's pissed with this but she
insisted on paying in the name of fillial piety. yet complained if
her parents were to pass away the flat despite her being the one
paying would be given to her brother. her parents prefer boys that
sort of thing. best outcome is the parents share 50% between the
kids.
I told her, make a choice and be happy with it, your parents
happy with your brother and you suffering with it. OR suffering
together but your wallet suffers less. you don't have to be
happy with your choice , just accept it as the one you
made.
her parents aren't "evil" or your types of "unfillial
parents"
they'll get around to accepting their daughter has a family of
her own now. but it's the daughter who can't let go.
but really rather then cutting off the parents she should access
whether she belongs to that type, and then whether her parents
truly require that much from her.
if her parents felt that they have to scale down they would, in
her own words, it's the moral blackmail she can't take.
I observe the belief that like it or not my parents
brought me into this world. and by that, I owe a debt of fillial
piety. (a view I think you disagree with) my parents weren't shitty
towards me so I guess it helps. I noticed that came up often in
your arguements against east asian fillial piety. anyway, another
thing that I noticed , the older generation..... were extremely
fillial especially the ones who were horrible to their children. .
daughters seem to care and forgave more compared to sons.
yet when newer values come from the west in the name of
empowerment of the individual. I also understand if I were to have
children they would likely subscribe to this view. love or
not if they don't succeed in life the parents would become a burden
they can dispose off easily. quite a few I talked to told me why
they still work in low end jobs is because they know times are hard
and they don't want to increase the burden on their kids.