I was six years old and was chasing a butter fly in the azalea
bushes, at the orphanage in Jacksonville, Florida, when I heard
someone yelling, "They are here, they are here." All the boys
started running, as fast as they could, towards the big white
building where we all lived. I also started running, as fast as I
could, wondering who and what the heck they were yelling about. All
the boys ran up the stairs to their rooms and started digging out
their Sunday best, which was not much at all. I walked to my room,
took my sunday clothes out of the closet and walked back down the
hallway with them slung over my right shoulder. "Who is coming, is
it Santa Clause"? I said, to one of the boys. "NO DUMMY", he
hollered at me. "It's the mommies and daddies, GET DRESSED, GET
DRESSED, he yelled. I put on my Sunday clothes, wiped my shoes off
on the corner of my bedspread, then walked out into the hallway,
waiting to see what everyone else was going to do and where they
were going in such a awful hurry.
It was like a mad house around there. There were boys running in
and out of bedrooms and bathrooms, and tripping all over one
another. "Move it you little brat", yelled one of the older boys as
he ran into me, knocking me down. I stood up, brushed myself off
and then headed down the back stairway. "You had better comb your
hair or you are not going to be picked for a mommy and daddy", said
one of the boys. I slowly walked back up the stairs, went into the
bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. My hair was a mess and
was sticking straight up in the back. Another boy came into the
bathroom and I asked him what was going on. He told me that once in
a while mommies and daddies came to the orphanage to buy kids and
that they took these kids home, where they could live in their
house and they were given lots of toys and nice things. "But I
don't want nice things, I just want a dog", I told him. "They have
dogs too. Everyone who gets picked, by the mommies and daddies,
gets a free dog and sometimes A BABY". "I don't want no baby. I
just want a dog", I replied.
I stood at the mirror for a long, long time trying to get my hair
to lay down, but it just would not stay down. I knew right then
that I would not get picked by the mommies and daddies and that I
would not get a dog of my own. I tried and tried to make my hair
stay down but no matter what I did it just wouldn't stay flat. I
ran back to my bedroom and grabbed my tooth paste, put a little on
my hand and rubbed my hands together, then I rubbed the tooth paste
through my hair and combed it. I looked into the mirror and to my
surprise my hair was no longer sticking up. I ran out of the
bathroom and down the stairs to catch up to the other boys who were
now lined up on the front porch. As I stood very proudly in line
with my hair laying flat the matron walked back and forth
inspecting us, one at a time. When she got to me she grabbed me by
the arm and asked me what I had done to my hair. "Nothing", I told
her. She jerked me by the arm, snatching me out of the line up, and
drug me into the back room where there was a large cement sink. She
ducked my head under the water faucet and washed my hair with the
soap sock. Then handed me a towel and told me to dry my hair. I
dropped the towel because she was rushing me along and kept pushing
me down the hallway with her hand in my back. When I bent over to
pick up the towel, she kicked me in the rear-end saying "If it is
not one damn thing with you little bastards, it is another. I have
a good mind to send you to your room". "I don't want to go to my
room, I just want a dog", I told her.
She grabbed me by the arm again and herded me towards the front
porch, where the other boys were waiting. I saw Mrs. Winters, the
head matron, walking down the road with a bunch of men and women.
"Where are the mommies and daddies", I asked one of the boys.
"Right there, stupid", he said, as he pointed toward the group.
"But you are not going to be picked cause you got big ears and your
hairs sticking up", he said. I tried to slick my hair down but it
would not stay. I lowered my hand and just stood there at
attention, like the other boys.
The four or five couples walked up and down the line of kids,
saying nothing. They just looked and smiled at each of us. Then
this one woman stopped in front of me, I looked up at her and I
said "Do you have a dog for me?" "We don't have a dog, son", she
told me. I looked at the boy next to me and said "They don't have
any dogs." "Do you brush your teeth everyday", she asked me. "I do
with my finger". I said, very proudly. She bit her lip, turned and
walked away looking at the next boy in line. I reached up and
slicked my hair down again, getting ready for the next couple who
were now walking down the line. But they passed me by without
speaking at all. As did the next and the next and the next.
When I was about thirty years old I went to the local dog pound to
get a dog of my own. I walked up and down the line of cages looking
at all those sad faces. Finally I came across this one dog, who's
hair was sticking up on her head and she had big ears. But I just
did not have the heart to make a choice. It would hurt me to badly
to take just one, and leave all the others behind. So I left her
there with the others, and I did not choose any of them at all. I
hope that is the way it was when these mommies and daddies came to
look at us kids. That it was just to sad for them to choose just
one.
Roger Dean Kiser, Sr.
------------------
Roger Dean Kiser, Sr.