Four in 10 S’poreans marry foreigners
Globalisation creating more chances for locals to meet, tie the
knot with non-citizens
By Mavis Toh
Ms A.L. Koh is 36, has a master’s degree in business
administration and works as a marketing manager in a multinational
company.
When her Singaporean boyfriend of six years broke off their
engagement in 2005 due to objections from his mother, she dropped
the idea of marriage totally.
Mismatched couples ‘At work, we are conditioned to fight like a man
but at home, they still expect us to go soft and take care of their
every need.’
MS A.L. KOH, 36, on
Singaporean men. She is married to a Frenchman
But last December, she walked down the aisle of a church in
France and said ‘I do’ to a Frenchman.
The two had met at work – the 40-year-old man is a project manager
in the same firm – and they have now set up home here. Like Ms Koh,
nearly 40 per cent of Singaporeans who tied the knot last year
married either a permanent resident or a foreigner.
Of the 20,775 marriages involving at least one citizen, 8,086
Singaporeans were hitched to non-citizen spouses. Of the 8,086
people, 6,200 were men and 1,886 were women.
There were 8,406 and 8,161 such marriages in 2005 and 2006
respectively.
Close to 90 per cent of these non-citizen spouses last year were
from Asia.
These figures were released recently by the National Population
Secretariat but the real figure may be even higher as some
Singaporeans marry their partners and register their marriages
overseas.
The Ministry of Community Development, Youth and Sports (MCYS)
attributed the trend to globalisation. It noted that Singaporeans
routinely travel overseas for work, study and leisure, and as the
country becomes more vibrant and cosmopolitan, many foreigners also
choose to live and work here.
‘This provides more opportunities for interaction between
Singaporeans and foreigners, and it is not surprising for some to
fall in love and marry,’ said a MCYS
spokesman.
Sociologist Paulin Straughan attributes the high figures in recent
years to Singapore’s open-door policy towards foreign talent.
She added that the largest group of Singaporean male singles are
usually lower educated while the female singles are usually higher
educated.
‘The educated women are more likely to travel overseas or meet
Caucasian spouses at work here. The men turn to foreign brides
through matchmaking agencies,’ she said.
While figures on the nationalities of foreign spouses are
unavailable, The Sunday Times understands that Malaysians form the
bulk. But the mushrooming of matchmaking agencies has brought an
influx of brides from Vietnam and China.
There are about 200 dating and matchmaking agencies here.
One of them is Blissful Marriage Consultants whose owner Han Lin
Zhuo matchmakes about 10 couples yearly, charging $5,888 for each
case.
His agency, set up in 2004, deals specifically with Hainanese
brides because they are ‘more virtuous and family-oriented’ than
Singaporean women.
‘If Singaporean men do not want to date career-minded Singaporean
women, I give them an alternative to date virtuous Hainanese
women,’ he said. He has contacts and an office in Hainan which
generate a constant pool of Hainanese women looking to pair up with
Singaporean men.
He added that most of his clients, aged between 28 and 50, had
tried dating Singaporean women before turning to him.
‘They date for three to five years and the girls are unwilling to
settle down. The men want to start a family and don’t want to risk
going through the dating process again,’ he said.
At another agency, Life Partner Matchmaker, owner Janson Ong said
many men had joined dating agencies before seeking help from a
matchmaker.
‘They join these agencies and waste a number of years without
getting a life partner. So they come to us – it’s faster and the
stigma of going to matchmakers has also gone down,’ he said.
But his business – the women come from Vietnam – has been affected
by the economic downturn since August last year. Now, he gets only
one case every few months. Previously, he could get up to six cases
monthly, charging $10,000 for each virgin bride.
He added that 40 per cent of his clients are degree holders with
good jobs.
‘They do well in their careers but when it comes to women, they’re
shy and have no courage to ask them out,’ he noted.
Ms Annie Chan, co-founder of Club2040, a matchmaking agency and
social dating club, said most of its clients still prefer to date
local women because of their ‘similar upbringing’.
She said men may turn to foreign women because they find local ones
too ‘career-minded’ and ‘driven’.
But Ms Chan said: ‘Local women feel that men here don’t understand
that our education system has pushed them to pursue such
high-powered careers. After a while, they feel that perhaps foreign
men will appreciate this part of them.’
Ms Koh agrees. Her former boyfriend had often complained about her
long working hours and felt insecure that she made more money than
him.
‘At work, we are conditioned to fight like a man but at home, they
still expect us to go soft and take care of their every need,’ she
said.
‘Foreign men are different; they know how to take care of their
women.’
With trans-national marriages taking off, one issue has surfaced –
citizenship for the children of these couples.
Dr Straughan said: ‘These kids have one foot in each culture and
country but Singapore may end up losing talents if the other parent
is from a First World country.’
For businessman Jerome Phua, 43, it does not bother him which
citizenship his son Ethan, three, takes up.
His wife is Indonesian and they met while he was on business in
that country.
‘Such marriages and ‘mixed kids’ will just add to the cosmopolitan
flavour of Singapore. After all, we’re already a rojak society,’ he
said.
