I was walking down the road on that sunny day, near bukit timah
road. On the left side, there was McRitchie Reservoir and on the
right there was Vivocity. Suddenly, i heard a big bang, and when I
looked around, there were 3 robbers brandishing knives, surrounding
me! I was aghast, but managed to suck in all the detail. There was
a big-sized robber, a medium-sized robber, and an abnormally tiny
robber with a tattoo on his face. However, they were all wearing
balaclavas over their heads, so that image was simply X-rayed using
my supervision.
"Gimme yr money or gimme yr life!" the biggest robber told me. He
rubbed his potbelly on the shortest robber, probably a midget.
There was lice jumping out of his navel. Quick as a whip, I whipped
around like Jacky Chan and kicked the biggest robber in his crotch.
His testicles bounced up and down as he gasped in pain and vomited
blood, keeling over dead. The medium-sized robber immediately took
action, swinging his knife at me. Using a quick-reflex upgrade that
I had purchased from a seedy tavern in DOTA, i caught his blow and
deflected it, sending the knife whirling into the air. I delivered
a hammer-blow with my iron maiden firsts to his head, dealing about
a hundred damage points in total. Before he even slumped over I had
the last midget in my hands, squeezing him to death.
In the end, I walked out of the situation unharmed and into
Vivocity. Suddenly, an Umbrella Corporation Army arrived, and the
leader, Jill Valentine told me that she had seen my kung-fu moves
and she was impressed. She kissed me and told me I was her Prince
Charming and that we would live together happily ever after in
Raccoon City hunting zombies and S.T.A.R.S members. Intrigued by
her visualization of our future together, I promptly accepted her
offer to live with her and was soon whisked away to live happily
ever after.
