Chemical Analysis Of Women

kopiosatu SG

Element: Woman
Symbol: Wo
Discover: Adam
Atomic Mass: Accepted at 53.6kg, but known to vary from 40-200kg
Occurrences: Copious quantities in all urban areas

Physical Properties:
Surface usually covered in painted film.
Boils at nothing; freezes without known reason.
Melts if given special treatment.
Bitter if incorrectly used.
Found in various states from virgin metal to common ore.
Yields if pressure applied in correct places.

Chemical Properties:
Has great affinity for gold, silver and a range of precious stones.
Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason.
Insoluble in liquids, but activity increases greatly by saturation in alcohol.
Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

Common Uses:
Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
Can be a great aid to relaxation.
Very effective cleaning agent.

Tests:
Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in the natural state.
Turns green when placed beside a better specimen.

Hazards:
Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.
Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come into direct contact with each other.
Should you experience itching, burning or rash, discontinue use immediately and seek medical treatment.

wuming78 SG

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kopiosatu SG

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piopoz SG

Element: Man
Symbol: Ah (short for A**h****)
Quantitative: Accepted at 7 inches though some isotopes can be as short as 4 inches.
Discoverer: Eve (discovered by accident one day when she had a craving for ribs)
Occurrence: Found following duel element Wo, often in high concentration near a perfect Wo specimen.

Physical properties
Surface often covered with hair bristly in some areas, soft in others.
Boils when inconvenienced, freezes when faced with Logic and Common Sense, melts if treated like a God.
Obnoxious when mixed with C*H*-OH (any alcohol).
Can cause headaches and severe body aches; handle with extreme caution.
Tends to fall into very low energy state directly after reaction with Wo.
Gains considerable mass as specimen ages, loses reactive nature.
Specimens can be found in various states ranging from deeply sensitive to extremely thick.
Rarely found in pure form after 14th year.
When pressure is applied, becomes stiff and unyielding; yields only when subtlety, subterfuge, flattery are applied

Chemical properties
All forms desire reaction with Wo, even when no further reaction is possible.
May react with several Wo isotopes in short period under extremely favorable conditions.
Most powerful embittering and aggravating agent known to Wo.
Usually willing to react with whatever is available.
Reaction Rates range from aborted/non-existent to pre-interaction effects (which tend to turn the specimen bright red.)
Reaction styles vary from extremely slow, calm and wet to violent/bloody.
When saturated with alcohols, will be fairly inert and will repel most other elements.
Is repelled by most household appliances and common household cleansers.
Is repelled by small children clothed in diapers, particularly those of the malodorous variety.
Is neutral to common courtesy and fairness.

Uses
Best results apparently near 18 for high reaction rate, 25-35 for favorable reaction style.
Heavy boxes, top shelves, long walks late at night, free dinners for Wo...
Can be used in recreational activities.

Tests
Pure specimen will rarely reveal purity, while reacted specimens broadcast information on many wavelengths.

Caution
Tends to react extremely violently when other Man interferes with reaction to a particular Wo specimen. Otherwise very malleable under correct conditions.

kopiosatu SG

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duotiga83 SG

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