There are times when we are timid and shy about expressing the
love we feel. For the fear of embarrassing the other person, or
ourselves, we hesitate to say the actual words "I love you". So we
try to communicate the idea in other words.
We say "take care" or " don't drive too fast" or "be good". But
really, these are just other ways of saying "I love you", " you are
important to me", "I care what happens to you", "I don't want you
to get hurt".
We are sometimes very strange people. The only things we want to
say, and the one things that we should say, is the one thing we
don't say. And yet, because the feeling is so real, and the need to
say it is so strong, we are driven to use other words and signs to
say what we really mean. And many times the meaning never gets
communicated at all and the other person is left feeling unloved
and unwanted.
Therefore, we have to LISTEN FOR LOVE in the words that people are
saying to us. Sometimes the explicit words are necessary, but more
often, the manner of saying things is even more important. A joyous
insult carries more affection and love within the sentiment which
are expressed insincerely.
An impulsive hug says I LOVE YOU even though the words said might
be very different.
Any expression of a person's concern for another says I love you.
Sometimes the expression is clumsy, sometimes even cruel. Sometimes
we must look and listen very intently for the love that contains.
But it is often there, beneath the surface.
A mother may nag her son constantly about his grades or cleaning
his room. The son may hear only the nagging, but if he listens
carefully, he will hear the love underneath the nagging. His mother
wants him to be well, to be successful. Her concern and love for
her son unfortunately emerge in her nagging. But it is love all the
same.
