I Hate It
When...
1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time....I
know where my watch is, pal......where the f*ck's yours? ... Do I
point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?
2. People who are willing to get off their arse to search the
entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV
and change the channel manually.
3. People say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it
too".......... F*cking right! What good is a cake if you can't eat
it?
4. People say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it
is........Why the f*ck would you keep looking after you've found
it?.......Do people do this? Who and where are they?
5. People say while watching a film "did you see that?".........No
tosser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the f*cking
floor.
6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?"......Didn't really
give me a choice there, did you sunshine?
7. Something is 'new and improved!'.......Which is it? If it's new,
then there has never been anything before it......If it's an
improvement, then there must have been something before it.
8. People say "life is short"......What the f*ck??......Life is the
longest damn thing anyone ever f*cking does!!.......What can you do
that's longer?
9. You are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come
yet?"........If the bus came would I be standing here,
Knobhead?
10. People who say things like 'My eyes aren't what they used to
be'........So what did they used to be? ears, Wellington
boots?
11. You are eating something and someone asks 'Is that
nice?'.........No it's really revolting I always eat stuff I
hate.
12. People who announce they are going to the toilet.......Thanks
that's an image I really didn't need.
13. McDonalds staff who pretend they don't understand you unless
you insert the 'Mc' before the item you are ordering.....It's has
to
be a McChicken Burger, just say "a Chicken Burger" and u will get a
blank look...........Well I'll have a McStraw and jam it in your
McEyes you McTosser.
14. When you're involved in a accident and someone asks 'are you
alright?'...... Yes, fine thanks, I'll just pick up my limbs and be
off.
