Originally posted by jOhO:
I read with interest Herself's reply to me, and Reed's post
and his courageous and obviously rewarding experiences.
Maybe we're talking about two different things here. You both talk
about getting to know women in an ad hoc manner. Dare i say you
both agree that men need to do more than just feel the twitch in
their cocks and going home to fix it? I guess i'm stating the
obvious.
The reason why i say we might be talking about two different things
here is becos (i do not speak on behalf of all men here) i,
personally, do not feel the need to pick up women this way. while i
cannot convincingly tell myself (the hardest person to lie to) that
it's not becos i have no guts, i believe that just purely
[b]looking at a girl is not enuff an impetus for me to get
to know her. I am very convicted of this statement. It is
not enuff for me to get to know a gal by vurtue of her
looks.
Of course i appreciate beauty. and that's where i will stop. i look
at her.. maybe for more than a few seconds, but never have the need
to get to know her, becos, again, of the above statement. i believe
it's not the lack of guts.
I agree if you are thinking in your minds that i could just open up
and get to know more friends. nothing sexual, nothing has to
eventuate from the "picking-up" incident. well this is the part
where i may sound snobbish. i feel no need to get to know more pple
this way.
no i'm not THAT snobbish that when there's opportunities to strike
up conversation i would purposely clam up with a i'm-too-good-for-u
attitude. such instances would be at a pub when i'm sitting along
the bar and there's someone sitting next to me who seems just as
bored as i am, or at a business seminar when we're waiting for
proceedings to commence, or even in a lecture (when i was studying)
and we're waiting for the baldy to put us to sleep. but NOT on a
crowded bus/train, on the street when every mother-son is rushing
to leave from a stressful job to a stressful home. or worse still..
they're rushing back to a wonderful home and u stop them to pick
them up! (ok i digress....)
so..., i conclude that i am somewhat happy with the way i meet new
pple, and this does not include abrupt approaches to members of the
public. it does not mean that i am timid. it also does not mean i
live in the past where men are portrayed to be wolves and women
sluts when such things occur.
to end on a lighter note, i am elated when Herself, Reed and my
frens tell me of such experiences! altho i wouldn't ever be in
their shoes relating a similar story in my own capacity, i can
still see the fun and thrill thru their recollections. i guess u
never know, i may end up telling a story here on how i picked up
this chick just out of nowhere, but i highly doubt it.
as at this post, right now, this is the bottom line for me
regarding this topic:
It is not enuff for me to get to know a gal by vurtue of
her looks.[/b]
Maybe i wasn't specific enough in the messages i posted
here...
Yes jOhO, I'd agree that you shouldn't fail the oldest test in the
book that is to "judge-a-book-by-its-cover", and i also have a
remaining faith in fate, regardless of how tiny a fraction that may
be. Despite that, my faith in fate is Fate helping me meet right
people. But i think leaving absolutely everything to fate is rather
haphazard. Approaching girls on the streets in public view is a
sub-topic in the opinion i'm trying to put across. I am not
promoting "love-on-the-street" or insta-luv. Maybe its because i'm
younger, and i know more immature(mentally--what were you thinking?
) guys. Maybe i'm not
blessed with a vast social network like you. I think there is no
such thing as love at first sight. In this i'm on the same side of
the fence as you. However, i simply feel that i need to widen my
circle of aqquaintances, for the mere purpose of
knowing them. Be it girls or guys. I got to know
this girl in the toilet when i had trouble getting a butterfly out
of my hair(really. the butterfly just got in. I imagine i smelled
like nectar. 
). She helped me,
and...haha the rest is history. So i earned myself one great
girlfriend in the "ad hoc" manner you are seemingly against. Am i
right to say you're against it?
Yes, jOhO, it would be wrong if you just tapped someone on the
shoulder when they're rushing to the nearest toilet with legs
squeezed convulsively in the middle. What i had meant was, like you
mentioned, in a social setting where everyone was bored to their
stinking socks,you spot an interesting person and decide to just
start talking. Not gorgeous, or exceedingly attractive, but a
person who looked nice to talk to. Agreeing with
Scorpius, it has to be spontaneous, not like you memorised some
lines or anything. You don't go, "have you met Mr. Right? I'm Mr.
Right-now." Slap positive, that one.
No one should approach every girl they see. That would be insane.
Girls you deem "potentially-interesting", yes. For example, you see
this girl at starbucks every morning. She smiles at you because she
noticed that you're a regular too. And she greets you in a friendly
manner, say something along the lines of "Mocha latte again?". So
if you yourself think she's worth knowing, you take a step
further.
In addition, I also have guy friends telling me they like so-and-so
(whom they already know as friends) but are afraid to take the
so-called plunge to depart from friendship.
Basically i can't pinpoint if guys are gut-less or anything. I only
want men to show it like it is, and say it like it is.
