Terrorists could attack aircraft with gel-filled
bras
KY Jelly: al-Qaeda's new weapon of fear? 
By Lester Haines
Friday 8th September 2006
In the time-honoured Register tradition of offering terrorists top
tips* on how to bring down airliners, we'd like this afternoon to
draw al-Qaeda's attention to two possible ways of getting binary
liquid explosives through security: gel-filled bras and KY
Jelly.
Both, according to the US's Transport Security Administration list,
are permitted items. Here's the full run-down:
Small amounts of baby formula and breast milk if a baby or small
child is travelling
Liquid prescription medicine with a name that matches the
passenger's ticket:
Up to 5 oz. (148ml) of liquid or gel low blood sugar
treatment
Up to 4 oz. of essential non-prescription liquid medications
including saline solution, eye care products and KY Jelly
Gel-filled bras and similar prostethics
Gel-filled wheelchair cushions
Life support and life sustaining liquids such as bone marrow, blood
products, and transplant organs carried for medical reasons
Inclusion of gel-filled bras has a pretty simple explanation.
They're commonly used as prosthetics for mastectomy patients, so
there's a personal dignity issue here. Try this account of the
indignity suffered by a 57-year-old cancer survivor en route to
Majorca who was told that her "gel-filled breast would need to be
checked in with baggage".
As for KY Jelly, well, we reckon it's pretty essential for those
passengers wishing to enjoy a "mile-high lube job", but we think US
officials should be aware that Jihadists could pack a standard tube
with enough ricin to kill around four million guinea pigs. To put
it in perspective, that's the equivalent of a six-foot-deep layer
of dead guinea pigs covering an area the size of three football
pitches. It's a chilling thought.
