IN THE 90s
Meet at Sparks Disco tonight, OK?
Where do Ah Bengs and Ah Lians hang out, and what do they do
there?
NGEE ANN CITY
AH LIAN totters on her white platform shoes
around the open space outside Ngee Ann City.
It is Saturday afternoon. She is sweltering
under the hot sun, but her Versace sunglasses
are perched on her head, holding back her
yellow-brown hair, instead of shielding her
eyes from the UV rays.
She takes a quick look around at the groups
gathered on the steps and in various corners of
the plaza. Spotting her best friend, she sashays
over. As she passes the groups of girls in tube
tops and low-waist pants, she turns up her
nose.
"Yeee...wear so sexy in the day. Chow ah
lian,'' she says to her best friend.
Suddenly, her Prada-look-alike bag emits an
electronic ringing sound. "Arlo,'' she yells into
her mobile phone. It is her boyfriend, Ah Beng.
"Meet at Sparks Disco tonight,'' he tells her.
She says: "OK.''
When the conversation ends, she does not put
her phone back into her bag. As she always
tells her friends: "Got, must show off, mah.''
She gets money to buy the phone from
working in a karaoke lounge.
And what does she do there? "Sing song only,
what. One night, if good tips, can earn a lot
money, OK!''
But ultimately, Ah Lian wants to become a
model. So does her best friend, and the two
have gone to Cover Looks to get their
makeovers and portfolios done.
They get bored with hanging around and
watching the other groups of Ahbengs pretend
to punch one another, and hordes of other Ah
lians puffing away on their cigarettes. So they
decide to go shopping inside.
Just then, a meek-looking reporter approaches
them. "Excuse me, I am from The Straits
Times. Can I interview you for a while?''
"For what?'' Ah Lian asks, suspiciously.
"Just want to know if you think those girls over
there are ah lians?''
"Of course lah, wear until so sexy. And you got
hear them talk or not? So vulgar!''
"Eh,'' the reporter hesitates. "Do you wear sexy
clothes?''
"Yah, got.''
"Do you use swear words?''
"Yah, got.''
"Eh...has anyone called you an ah lian before?''
"Got! But I not one, OK! I tell them back.''
At this point, she gets a little agitated, and
raises her voice. The reporter says a hasty
"thank you'' and beats her retreat.
Tired of walking around, the girls head for the
atrium in the basement, towards the huge video
screen there. Hundreds of other lians and
bengs are hanging around, mostly squatting or
sprawling on the floor, watching the music videos, which alternate
between Hongkong
and Taiwanese singers, and Spice Girls and Boyzone.
Before they know it, night casts a shadow over the buildings
outside. Inside the mall,
the clothes get shinier, the make-up thicker and the platform shoes
higher.
Ah Lian is now outside Sparks disco on the seventh floor, under the
neon
green-and-yellow sign. She has been paging Ah Beng for the last
half hour.
Just as she is ready to storm off, a lime-green Honda Civic pulls
up next to her, its
engine revving powerfully. Ah Beng winds down the window and the
thumping bass of
techno music is heard.
"Why so late?'' she pouts.
"Sorry lah.''
How can she not forgive him? Dressed in a tight bright yellow shirt
with front zip and
white Valentino jeans, the silver bolts on his black Versace belt
standing out, he looks
so handsome.
With the streaks of green in the fringe of his hair, some people
say that he looks like
one of the Grasshopper guys, or a Chinese version of Nick from the
Backstreet Boys.
She once stood up in front of a bar in a pub and announced proudly:
"My boyfriend is
Ah Beng.''
Soon all their friends arrive, mostly on their Piaggio motorbikes.
There are about 15 of
them, the usual crowd for a Saturday night outing. Inside, the
dance floor is already
packed with bodies shaking and grooving to the latest Euro-dance
tunes. At the bar,
bourbon cokes and vodka limes are being gulped down.
But those drinks are out-dated. The "in'' things these days is
alcoholic soda, e Thirty
Three especially. Ah Lian orders a long island tea, an all-time
favourite with the Lians.
Ah Beng is a beer drinker. But he will not be caught dead with
Tiger or Anchor. It is
Corona, from a bottle, with a slice of lime, for him.
The hapless journalist who had approached Ah Lian earlier slips
quietly next to Ah
Beng and asks him: "Excuse me, are you an Ah Beng?'' He gives her a
look she will
never forget - not threatening or leering, but a look that only a
Beng can give.
"That day I went to watch movie, someone call out: "Ah Beng!' I
thought call me. Turn
out it's that Ah Beng fellow from Army Daze. He also watching
movie. So you say I
Ah Beng or not?''
Silenced and feeling out-of-place, the reporter merges into the
crowd, and Ah Beng
tells his friend: "These ang moh types keep calling us Ah Beng.
They think their England
good then so what?''
He looks around for Ah Lian. But she has gone to the toilet. Inside
the ladies, it is
smoky and crowded, and at least 10 ah lians are elbowing for space
in front of the sink
for a look in the mirror. Ah Lian is wearing shiny eye-shadow, dark
lipstick and nail
polish. Out of the corner of her eye, she notices an ah lian
staring at her. Wah, looking
for fight is it?
Fights are common. Just last week, some ah beng had insulted her,
and her Ah Beng
stood up for her, confronting the guy with his friends. "He not
gang type what. He just
protecting me,'' she told her best friend after the incident.
Ah Beng drives off into the night, with Ah Lian in the front seat.
Aqua's Barbie Girl is
blasting from the car's audio system. Thus ends another episode of
Ah Lian and Ah
Beng in their fantasy Barbie and Ken party world.
But there is always next Saturday.