Senna heads testing times
Written by The Liberator
The exhumed body of three times Formula 1 World Champion Ayrton
Senna topped testing times today at the Jerez circuit in Spain.
Riding a rust unicycle the Brazilian lapped the circuit in 1 minute
exactly, bettering false champion Micheal Schumacher's time by 20
minutes.
Schumacher when asked about todays poor performance said It wasnt
my fault, it never is.
A spokesperson for Sennas Unicycle team said "We felt it was time
we got a real man back into F1, & The only one we could find
was Senna. For too long it has been dominated by a cheating son of
a bitch."
Longtime rival Alain Prost was heard to remark "It's good that
Ayrton's back. He really won in 1989, I drove into him & then
got my fellow countryman Jean Marie Balestre to disqualify
him."
Senna who won the Championship in 1988, 1989 & 1990 & has
held the record number of pole positions (65) for over 13 years is
the greatest racing driver of all time. Sennas former co-pilot,
God, said of this He is you know, always has been, always will
be! Before bursting into a chorus of Tina Turners Simply the
Best holding one finger in the air & chanting Ole, Ole, Ole,
Sennnaaaaaa, Sennnnna
Other Formula 1 teams are set to follow suit by re-enlisting famous
drivers from the past in the coming months, Scotsman Jim Clark is
set to make a re-entry into the sport to partner Juan Manuel Fangio
on a skateboard. Jackie Stewart will be returning on foot, &
Graham Hill has purchased an old scooter from Arthur Daley. Gordon
Browns hopes this year however are looking less promising as
Economic Growth is slow. Preliminary testing has shown them also
ALL to be significantly faster than Schumacher.
1 Senna On a Unicycle 1m00.s
2 Clark On a Skateboard 1m14.s
3 Fangio Also on a Skateboard 1m14.s
4 Stewart On foot 1m14.s
5 G. Hill On a Scooter 1m14.s
6 Hawthorn Also on foot 1m15.s
7 Moss In an Electric Wheelchair 1m15.s
8 Von Tripps Also on a Scooter 1m15.s
9 Lenin Riding a wave of Democratic Centralism 1m15.s
10 Lewis Collins Riding Martin Shaw 1m15.s
11 J. Lo Being carried by her Massive Ego 1m16.s
12 Prost Riding a Hobby Horse 1m17.s
13 Gordon Brown Riding on Economic Growth 20m18.s
14 SCHUMACHER Ferrari 21m14.s
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It was a spoof. 
