Hi everyone, How do you feel when u accidently hurt someone that
is truly like u but you thought he was jus trying to play a fool
with your heart.
I regreted in my actions...
Heres the story goes, Last Feb that was somewhere new yr , one of
my family members admitted to the hospital and my whole family was
very worried about him and many unlucky things keep happening to me
. Then comes this student nurse who looks is normal and i know hes
much younger than me. I didnt thought much about him as he is
rather quiet at his work. Well , his impression to me was like
normal nurse doing his duty. He takes gd care of my sick family
member.
I was very grateful of what he done but i didnt have any chance to
thank him. Then the followng week. One of my family member
discharge. We left the hospital as the days goes by , i went to
surf my internet ... i was to shocked to know that the caring nurse
found me in friendster he didnt know my name or even email add by
using a search of 1081.. he found me . i was happy and thought we
can be friends since fate has come. Then we chatted on the net and
we decided to meet up for coffee the very next day. When we met up
, he confessed his feelings for me and i was totally in shocked
didnt kknow what to say or do . I told him that was too fast .. he
tld me that is ok he can wait and saying that his feelings will
always be the same til the end. I was somehow touch by his sincere
but my feelings was totally unsure. He was just too young ( 2yrs
younger ) for me and what i was looking for is someone with stable
career and ready to move to long term. My mind was totally mind
...
As days goes by ( 5 days ) later, he suddenly sms me stating that
he been strugglling with his feeling and wish to remain as friends
. I was shocked in his behaviour . How come he wrote such things ?
Is he playing a fool ? what is he up to ? I couldnt accept it and
very angry with it. i tried calling him and he didnt pick up only
avoids my calls.. He says dun call him anymore and he wanna hid
from me. I did nothing to make him feel like hidding and i really
puzzled in his actions. I cried badly and i told my friend abt wat
happen . Then My friend advised me to teach him a lesson on not to
play people feeling . I didnt thought of the consequence and went
on with it. I didnt know it could cause his entire future hanging
up and i regreted. We went to sent an email regarding his work and
indeed he got what he have .. a warning letter from sch . And he
was told not to contact me anymore or else he be kick out. I was
shocked and he told me the truth over the net that he was actually
not playing out my feelings he do like me but he still loves his ex
gf. and he was shocked on my actions too and decided to stop
everything he said that now i have cause his future hanging and he
want me to let go of him. I cried and saying sorry that i cause him
misery . He kept saying is ok he know y i did that .
the next morning , i quickly callup all the agencies to drop the
matter on him and let him continue his future . The whole matter is
now cleared and i told him that i have managed to save his future
for him and everything is over. He said to me ok. Know that he is
still angry with me on this but he didnt express it out. i decided
to leave him alone thought we said we remain as friends but knowing
that the crack is there is very hard to forget.
That nite i saw him online i wanted to talk to him but is was a
very cold conversations and my tears strat dropping and i told him
how sorry i was but he kept saying is ok and he didnt blame me.
After this incident i start to be very quiet and also stay away
from friends. I kept my self unconactable . I was worried abt him
and keep thinking abt him. But i know is useless when one starts to
be cold .. I cried til i fall sick . Im totally regerted in my
wrong doings and also hope he could really be happy now since
things is over.
I was so glad that when were together i managed to make a guy face
from frown to happy. I missed those times though is very short with
him . Especially when we 1st chat on line ....
Sighz.. i missed him alot .
