Most Embarrassing Feminine Moments
A contest was organized by "New Woman Magazine" on
"Most Embarrassing moments" topic. The following are few good
embarrassing moments that magazine received from several
women.
----------------- Curl Up and Die ------------------
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three
kids in tow and asked
loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a
blow job?"
Melinda Lowe, 39,
Seguin, TX
----------------------- Pad, please! ---------------
An insurance man visited me at home to talk about our
mortgage insurance. He
was throwing a lot of facts and figures at me, and I
wanted to follow as
best I could, so I told my 6-year-old son to run and
get me a pad.
He came back and handed me a Kotex right in front of
our guest.
Kathy Newman, 46,
Winston-Salem, NC
----------------------- Ho, Ho, Ho ----------------
I was taking a shower when my 2-year-old son came into
the bathroom and
wrapped himself in toilet paper. Although he made a
mess, he looked
adorable, so I ran for my camera and took a few shots.
They came out so well
that I had copies made and included one with each of
our Christmas cards.
Days later, a relative called about the picture,
laughing hysterically, and
suggesting I take a closer look.
Puzzled, I stared at the photo and was shocked to
discover that in addition
to my son, I had captured my reflection in the mirror
wearing nothing but a
camera!
----------------------- Lady Golfer------------------
I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of
golf balls. I was
unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After
browsing for several
minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking
gentlemen who works at
the store.
He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I
looked at him and said, "I
think I like playing with men's balls."
Colleen Collins,
31, Ferndale, MI
--------------------- Nuts about You----------------
My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store
that sold a variety
of nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the
boy behind the counter
asked if we needed any help.
I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts." My
sister started to laugh
hysterically, the boy grinned, and I turned beet-red
and walked away.
To this day, my sister has never let me forget.
Faye Emerick, 34,
Ellerslie, MD
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The following are the top four winners of a Most
Embarrassing Moments
Contest in the "New Woman Magazine":
----------------- Na-na na-na na-nah! ------------
While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler
decided to release some
pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to
grab hold of her after
receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other
patrons. I told her that
if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be
punished.
To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a
voice just as
threatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will
tell Grandma that I
saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!"
The silence was deafening after this enlightening
exchange. Even the tellers
stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the last
of my dignity and
walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow.
The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me
were screams of
laughter.
Amy Richardson;
Stafford, Virginia
------------------- Surprise! ----------------------
It was the day before my eighteenth birthday. I was
living at home, but my
parents had gone out for the evening, so I invited my girlfriend
over
for a romantic night alone. As we lay in bed after making
love, we heard the
telephone ring downstairs. I suggested to my
girlfriend that I give her a
nude piggyback ride to the phone. Since we didn't want
to miss the call, we
didn't have time to get dressed.
When we got to the bottom of the stairs, the lights
suddenly came on and a
whole crowd of people yelled, "SURPRISE!"
My entire family: aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins
and all my friends
were standing there. My girlfriend and I were frozen
in a state of shock and
embarrassment for what seemed like an eternity.
Since then, no one in my family has planned a surprise
party again.
Tim Cahill,
Poughkeepsie, New York
------------------ Priceless ----------------------
One of the funniest "most-embarrassing-moments stories
I've come upon in a
long time was about a lady who picked up several items
at a discount store.
When she finally got up to the checker, she learned
that one of her items
had no price tag.
Imagine her embarrassment when the checker got on the
intercom and boomed
out for all the store to hear, "PRICE CHECK ON LANE
THIRTEEN, TAMPAX, SUPER
SIZE."
That was bad enough, but somebody at the rear of the
store apparently
misunderstood the word "Tampax" for THUMBTACKS."
In a business-like tone, a voice boomed back over the intercom. "DO
YOU
WANT THE KIND YOU PUSH IN WITH YOUR THUMB OR THE KIND YOU
POUND IN WITH A
HAMMER?"
----------------- Mom's Advice-----------------------
A teacher noticed that a little boy at the back of the
class was squirming
around, scratching his crotch and not paying
attention.
She went back to find out what was going on. He was
quite embarrassed and
whispered that he had just recently been circumcised
and he was quite itchy.
The teacher told him to go down to the principal's
office. He was to phone
his mother and ask her what he should do about it. He
did it and returned to
his class.
Suddenly, there was a commotion at the back of the
room. She went back to
investigate only to find him sitting at his desk with
his penis hanging out.
"I thought I told you to call your mom." she screamed.
"I did," he said, "And she told me that if I could
stick it out till noon,
she'd come and pick me up from school."
So are you happy and de-stressed now????
