im a muslim. i believe in what they teach. however, im not being
a 'good' muslim. (btw im not gonna start preaching or discuss about
anyones faith here. i respect in whatever your faith is).
Accepting that a belief may be true and believing a belief is
different. You have to understand that. I spent a bulk of my life
accepting my family's religion may be true, but I never truly
believed that it was true. But after I stepped out of that and
started to form my own values did my life streamline to align my
beliefs. There is no 'good' or 'bad' muslim, ultimately ask if your
actions align with your beliefs (or what you want to believe in),
then why or why not.
ive been drinking, i work in a place wherby i handle alcohol,
not always tho but at times its unavoidable, thus, made me drink,
even when im working.
Placing yourself in the midst of temptation is the worst
way to curb a habit.
last few weeks, ive started praying. but my drinking "addiction'
just wont go away, especially when im with my friends - chinese
friends - colleagues. so a part of me says, f*ck it man. you'll
eventually go to hell.
Prayer is powerful because it gives hope. But when prayer is
used as a tool of absolution, that's when it's dangerous. You pray
to alleviate your guilt temporarily, but you find that its effects
become less effective. That's because it's your go-to method and
your mind realizes that nothing's really changed and subsequently
accepts the fact. Plus the defeatist attitude adds to that.
Prayer without works is dead.
well the point is here, i dont wanna live a sinful life. to cut
it short, its pointless right if i were to pray and seek
forgiveness from god, but i still end up doing things which are
prohibited by my religion. i want to do good.
The trouble with the teaching that God forgives you is that
people will misuse and abuse it. Alleviating your guilt without
taking action to change your situation will just reenforce the idea
that "it's okay. as long as I pray, it's okay." That's dangerous
thoughts right there.
so, i was thinking of giving back to the soceity. i was thinking
maybe i could, set aside some of my salary, and donate it to those
who need it more than i do. OR, i actually am really really
interested in doing volunteering work. you know, like those cancer
society or make a wish foundation and they make events for the
needy or the less fortunate and they need volunteers and stuff - it
is part of giving back to the society too, right?
Emotional compensation. You want to give back in hopes that a
higher power will acknowledge your willingness and hopefully pardon
you. It's not a zero-sum game. There's no scoreboard. A murderer
who is also a doctor is still a murderer even though he saves lives
on a regular basis. Sure, his works will be lauded, but they do not
take away from his crimes. Vice versa.
Work on cutting away your bad habits. Don't use voluntarism as a
means to carry on staying in your situation.
Hence this thought pattern occurs:
sometimes, i keep thinking whether i would even wake up the next
day. so even if i were to die, i would have at least made my part
by doing something good, whenever i can, even if i go to hell.
so, what do you guys think? and if you think volunteering suits
best, where do i start? thanks guys. (and please dont talk about
religion here. im bad enough at it so lets just think at it as an
antheist, except you believe in good and bad, yin and yang, karma
etc.)
I tried to remain as neutral here as possible. It doesn't
conflict with any religious beliefs.
